# Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers



## longgone (May 5, 2009)

*Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *

� Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

� Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

� The last thing I want to do is hurt you; But it's still on the list.

� Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

� If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

� We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

� War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

� Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

� The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

� Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

� To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

� A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

� How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

� Some people are like Slinkies … not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

� Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.

� A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.

� Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR".

� I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

� Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

� Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

� Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?

� Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

� A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

� Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

� Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

� I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.

� There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

� I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.

� When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

� You're never too old to learn something stupid.

� Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

�  A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are trying to catch one as when you are in it.

� If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

� Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine


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## chrisstef (Mar 3, 2010)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.


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## shouldwood (Jan 6, 2007)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


This is GREAT!!! What words of wisdom and hilarious too. Thanks for making me smile today. Very true too.


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## BritBoxmaker (Feb 1, 2010)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


I used to be conceited but now I'm perfect.

You're never alone with Schizophrenia.


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## Dennisgrosen (Nov 14, 2009)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


they say its stupid to go around and talk to yourself ….................well at least he is wise and smart compared to who they talk to

thank´s for the smile it saved the day 
Dennis


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## ETwoodworks (Jan 10, 2011)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Lol I think the first one is my favorite.


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## woodworkerscott (Sep 12, 2010)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Thanks! A great read.


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## superdav721 (Aug 16, 2010)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


man who fart in church sit in pew alone


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## rance (Sep 30, 2009)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


There are some good ones in there. Thanks.

You show me a pig on the highway, and I'll show you a road hog.


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## Kentuk55 (Sep 21, 2010)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


no. 4 is the best in my book


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## brianinpa (Mar 16, 2008)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


There are some real Gems in that list.


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## fernandoindia (May 5, 2010)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Love to read it. (In my work station)


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## Flocktothewall (Jan 16, 2011)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


� A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

Now that's awesome!


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## devann (Jan 11, 2011)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Good judgement comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgement


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## dave_oh (Aug 24, 2009)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


These made my morning! Here's another one: "It's better to keep your mouth shut and have people think you're an idiot than to open it and remove all doubt."


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## JoeinGa (Nov 26, 2012)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Funny stuff!
.
"You dont have to always agree with me. I respect your right to have stupid ideas that won't work" 
.
"I thought I made a mistake once. I was wrong" 
.


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## handsawgeek (Jul 31, 2014)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Here's some math for y'all….

If f = the optimum amount of tools necessary in a given shop, and
x = the number of tools currently owned, then

f = x + 1


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## theoldfart (Sep 9, 2011)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


^ works for me!


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## handsawgeek (Jul 31, 2014)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...


Behind every great man is a woman…rolling her eyes.


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## DIYaholic (Jan 28, 2011)

longgone said:


> *Words of Wisdom For Woodworkers *
> 
> � Do not argue with an idiot; he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
> 
> ...





> Behind every great man is a woman…rolling her eyes.
> 
> - handsawgeek


Behind every great man is a woman….
But don't let his wife find out!!!


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