# Dumbest Christmas gifts EVER for woodworkers



## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

From time to time, while organizing my piles of junque, I come across this really dopey quartz clock made from a 10"saw blade. It was a gift from my Mother, probably 20-25 years ago. I don't have the heart to toss it, and the single AA battery within is corroded beyond belief. Now, my mother is closing in on 80 years old, and there's that twinge of guilt that zings through me for not ever hanging the damn thing in my shop.
Question for all LJ's: What's the dumbest gift you ever got, that is woodworking-related? Maybe two categories, the dumbest gift you ever got, OR, the dumbest gift you could think of for a Woodworker?


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Greetings: I also have a 10" sawblade clock( It says Skil on it) that runs on a single AA battery. My 2 nephews gave it to me one year for Christmas. The oldest brother was about 8, and the youngest was 6. Now they are 31, and 29. That's how long I've had mine. I've hung it in two different shops(hanging in mine now), keeps perfect time, and I always know when to knock off for dinner, or for the day. It's made from a steel blade. I wouldn't take any amount of money for it, cause they are my 2 favorite nephews…..... keep on keeping on.


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Thanks for the sentiment, Rick!
There was a question in there, did you miss it?


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## Rustic (Jul 21, 2008)

I have not received a bad woodworking gift. I would love to have a saw blade clock that was made by a family member


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## GMman (Apr 11, 2008)

I have a saw blade clock and it works and looks good, it would be stupid of me to throw it away, every shop should have one.
I also never had any bad woodworking gifts, any woodworking gift I get I enjoy and use them.


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## cabinetmaster (Aug 28, 2008)

I can't think of a bad gift I have ever received either. Buy I'd like to see what others post too.


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

I've got one of those saw blade clocks that Grizzly gave me some years ago as a thank you for an order. Battery ran down about 5 years ago and I never did get round to replacing it. I also got a hat from a friend that says "Worlds Greatest Carpenter" on it, he don't know the difference, he's a computer geek.


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## mark88 (Jun 8, 2009)

my dad has a mastercraft brand blade clock but never took care of it and now its rusted etc. I wish I had it. I think he threw it out by now. Bad gift? Seeing someone else get a tool you wanted.


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## webwood (Jul 2, 2009)

my x wife gave me one clamp a few years back - what do you do with one clamp? buy 3 more


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## pete57 (Jan 22, 2009)

I agree that there is not a lot of bad christmas gifts but two things, We draw names at Christmas for brother-in-laws and I am the only one that uses his hands in a craft, the others are computer people and their hobbies are computer stuff and reading. Every year I get a screw driver with the interchangable tips. I have about ten of them throughout the house and a couple in the shop and one in each of the vehicles..

The other one is a classic. My previous Mother-in-Law overheard me telling my ex that I need some casters(wheels) to put on different things so that I could move things around the shop. We always went to their house on Christmas day for dinner and open gifts with her family. My Mother-in-law was joyful and handed me a gift and I opened it to find four little plastic caster wheels like the ones that come on a toy baby crib. They were clear about the size of a 50 cent piece with a silver caster. I told her she was the best and they would be very useful, Thank you. My ex talked about those wheels every year after that. I still have them in my junk hardware tub and may use them someday. I will have to buy the inserts first!! LOL


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## kolwdwrkrsgirl (Sep 16, 2009)

I was brought up to be greatful to receive a gift. It REALLY is the thought that counts…and I would never complain if it's not my IDEAL gift. Complaining about someone thinking enough of you to give you something doesn't make sense to me.
The truth is that most people not involved in woodworking have no idea what to give to someone who is. The fact that they paid attention to ATTEMPT to get something in a field related to your interests is gift enough. It just means that you're lucky enough to have people in your life that care. That's just the way I feel about it.

Happy Holidays to ALL Lumberjocks…..and to ALL a good night! : )


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## GMman (Apr 11, 2008)

pete make her a gift so you can use those wheels, she will love that.


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## GMman (Apr 11, 2008)

k girl you are so right "It REALLY is the thought that counts" what I do I will give a hint like I will look at something and say that, boy that is nice I should get one of those, works all the time with my wife and kids.


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## MedicKen (Dec 2, 2008)

Webwood said*"my x wife gave me one clamp a few years back - what do you do with one clamp? buy 3 more"*
--erik & christy-
Giving only 1 clamp is like giving someone a gun for Christmas and not giving them any shells. Its useless


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## webwood (Jul 2, 2009)

i certainly didn't mean to disrespect anyone - we both laughed about it after she understood - i just thought it was funny


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

This thread got me to remembering. One time I got a tape measure. It was 6' with a post it pad on the side, a little pencil in a hole on the end, and a bubble level mounted on top. The level was glued on crooked, and the first time I let it go, the tape snapped off at the 3/4" mark. LOL Not wood related, but there is a salesman at work who is always looking for favors from the techs. Last year he gave all of us a Christmas gift. He bought a set of wrenches from HF, and put a little bow on each one, and handed them out to each of us. Not a set, just the individual pieces of the set. LOL


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## craftsman on the lake (Dec 27, 2008)

I think it's funny to get tools with bubble levels built into them. Drills, hammer (yes it's true), wrench. Geesh.


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## GMman (Apr 11, 2008)

Dan are you going to give him something this year, maybe a nut that does not fit the wrenches.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

I just thought of one I'd forgot about when I heard Mother-in-law mentioned. Several years ago, my m-i-l gave me this thing called a "Flying Lure"! She knew I fished compatision bass tournaments, and she just knew this was the "catch-all bait". She watches QVC alot, and saw this piece of crap advertised on there, and ordered it for me for Christmas. It was a kit where you could use different lures with different attachments, or something….. I don't remember. I remember one looked like a spinnerbait (real funky-looking). I just hugged her real good, give a little kiss on the cheek, and took it home and threw it in one of my tackle drawers. I guess it's still there, but I never used it. It was advertized as the "miracle lure"....... yea right… That thing wasn't worth two dead flys….......... funny !!! But I never told her I didn't use it. I love my m-i-l.


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## RvK (Nov 22, 2009)

I got a set of those magnetic arm and wristbands for holding small tools and screws. Tho when I went to play around with them, they didnt hold anything, upon reading the fine print on the packaging "ATTENTION this device requires magnetization before first use.".... Fail magnets are fail.


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

Rick, I bought one of those and caught a 143lb small mouth with it. LMAO


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## bigike (May 25, 2009)

hey i have one of those clocks and its hanging in my shop right now, i like it. my wife got it for me after i told her to. but the dumbest woodworking tool i got was my first tablsaw, a craftsman jobsite saw. once set up i thought it was cool but then i tried to make a straight and clean cut no luck, and everytime u turn on the saw it was so loud, so what i ended up doing was checking to make shure the fence was inline with the blade everytime i made a cut also the mitre slots were to small to fit a regular miter gage and only by a 1/16" that sucked. but now i have a delta unisaw tuned to peak performance and it's all good.


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## yarydoc (Oct 16, 2009)

My son gave me a pair of glasses (with no glass in them) that had little flashlights on the ear pieces that turned on when you opened them. I still have them. Sometimes the best thing to say is THANKS.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Hey Dan: You must have the world record smallie? I didn't think anybody had one of them but me…...
Good to see my m-i-l wasn't the only sucker that fell for that POS…....... now LMAO!!!


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## pete57 (Jan 22, 2009)

I am quite happy now. My new wife is into hobbies and she likes the time I spend in the shop. She is quite knowledgable about all my tools, and machines. She found alot of my chair building tools online and she knows what a great deal is. She wants to do the suttler thing when retire, you know with the 18th century clothes and all. She gave me a nice set of chisels in a box a couple years back. She got them for 80% off. I think they are Wood River. They are great. She has encouraged me to excell in wood carving and Windsor Chair Building. Hell man she wanted me to get the turning tools asap when the lathe came. I am very lucky. I can mention a new saw blade and one will be sitting on the table saw.

I know we all get goofy little gifts and trinkets, but for those of us out there with great wives and family who know that we love working with wood because we are happy doing it, I give them a great big Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year!! Not to take from the question, just thought I would throw that out there. I quess that kolwdwrkrsgirl's dancing in the sawdust got me thinking!!


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## dustbunny (May 18, 2009)

A pencil leash. The retractable kind that plugs to the eraser end of your pencil.
I guess if I could find where I set it down, I would find my pencil.
You are all right…it's the thought that counts. LOL

Lisa


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## dbhost (Jul 20, 2009)

Roto Zip. I still have no idea what it's good for…

I don't have the sawblade clock, but I DO have a Snap On Tools 75th Anniversary clock. The clock works need to be replaced now, but the girls sure do look nice even after all these years!


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## mattg (May 6, 2008)

I don't get gifts anymore, so any gift would be great!!!


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## RetiredCoastie (Sep 7, 2009)

There's no such thing as a dumb gift, just unworthy recipients!


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## kolwdwrkr (Jul 27, 2008)

dbhost, I love my rotozip. With the right bits it's great for cutting out electrical outlets and such in cabinet backs during installation, as well as other things. It's used for cutting drywall and things like that as well. You could always regift it to me :^)


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## bent (May 9, 2008)

i revcieved a homemade machinist square once. my mom found it at a flea market or something and just knew i'd love it. it's really useful for making sure all of my cuts are exactly 87 degrees. it's one of those "thought that counts" gifts.

also i'm with kolwdwrkr, the rotozip is a good thing to have. i've cut alot of tile with mine, and i know more than one drywaller that would be lost without thiers.


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## GMman (Apr 11, 2008)

If you check Canadian Tire for Mastercraftkit #54-1251-8 you can see all the attachment that comes with it, I find that it is way better than a Rotozip,you can use up to a 1/4 router bit with it and it angles, also has a light.
A gift I received 3 years ago and is a very good tool.

http://www.canadiantire.ca/home.jsp?site=WebStore

Click on the picture from the web site to see all attacments.


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## snowdog (Jul 1, 2007)

Loved reading the thread. I also cant remember any bad shop gifts. I wish my mom would have give a saw blade clock. 

Merry Christmas to all of you


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## CharlieM1958 (Nov 7, 2006)

I have a saw blade clock in my shop. I thought it was an OSHA requirement!

For dumb gifts, the old Black & Decker battery-operated tape measure ranks right up there in my book.


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Retiredcoastie: Right on!
Over the years I have received many "dummy" or unusable (by me) gifts. They were given to me by people who included me on their gift list, which is what I truly appreciated and would never let them know I disliked the gift they honored me with.
I have a collection of these unused gifts in a big box and now that I am answering the "Green" call, I am busy recycling them and giving them as gifts to others - making sure I don't give them to the one that origionally gave it to me. So actually there are no dumb received gifts, if it is of no use to you then just accept it as an a gift for someone else next year, saving you time and money.
Bah Humbug


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Oh, I forgot, Maybe someone could suggest who might want a Belly Button Lint Extrator and Cleaning Kit. It is unused and made in the USA.


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## GMman (Apr 11, 2008)

Roger you're bad lol


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## Dennisgrosen (Nov 14, 2009)

I get two of those tapemeasure thing that year they were thrown on the marked they were too clumcy and could only push the tape 1/3 aut so I don´t use it and I can´t find a way to recycle them but maybee one day
I can tell the people who gave them to me that they was great gift 
but it´s the thought that´s count right and my gift is always visible just in case that some of the people come in the shop

happy holydays to all and your fammely´s

Dennis


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## scrappy (Jan 3, 2009)

ANY gift is a good gift. We should never turn our noses up at things other people do for us. It is the thought that counts and if they don't know we have no use for it mabey it is our fault for not letting them know more about us.

Be thankfull you have someone who cares enuf to try and make you a part of their life.

Scrappy


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Yeah, ok scrappy and everyone else who focused on the "Thought of the gift" angle. Point taken, and I did express my remorse about under-appreciating that goofy saw-blade clock. On the other hand….my mother had a huge yard sale some years back, and I just happened upon it. In it were my 5 projects from junior high school shop class, all priced ridiculously low. They were 30+ years old! The bird houses too, which I made for her as a kid and had been mounted on the garage since 1967. All sold before I got there, but she was so happy to tell me about her sales. Also he waterfall-crested bedroom set which I once borrowed for use in my apartment, restored, re-veneered and like showroom-new when I returned them, in that yard sale for $50/set. Ditto the mahogany coffee table which I built to match her living room set, to replace the one my brother destroyed in a party prank (don't ask). $30 freakin dollars, ouch, that hurts!!! It's just life, that's the way it is. I'll continue to send thoughtful gifts to family and friends as I always have throughout my adult life. And bite my tongue when I receive such crap as a book: "101 Uses For a Dead Cat".....I'm sure there are those of us who know exactly what I mean. Pete57 does!! Thanks for all the *nice* replies!
Oh, and one other very relevant point: The aforementioned clock was originally received by my step-father, at their company Christmas party, it was a promotional item furnished to him and his crew by the sales rep for Porter-Cable. I probably should have filled in these details in the original post. A classic Seinfeldian re-gifter!!


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

OK, so your mother does not share your affection for family hierlooms, life goes on. If you're finished with that book, pass it this way, I have not read that one yet.


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## RetiredCoastie (Sep 7, 2009)

Sounds like you are hung up on comparing what you got for what you gave. Just accept it in the spirit in which it was given! Sounds like you have gift issues, seek help!


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Most woodworkers, those who share the fruits of their labor, all know the story of giving more than they get. It comes with the territory. I don't have a problem with that! Well.. I kinda do have a problem with re-gifting…[shrugs] C'est la vie!!


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

If you wrote it than by all means autograph it for me. 101 things to do with a dead cat may be a collectors item some day. LOL


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Now, Now gentlemen. Please get into the Christmas spirit. I just think people respond with answers from their own experiences and, those are only right or wrong in the readers mind, so we should just leave it there and respect their answers. I just found it interesting that so many had received unwanted or unusable gifts, I thought it only happened to me. lol
Someone hit the nail on the head by saying some people find it hard to select a gift for you, so don't say nasty things about it, just accept it with gratitude and figure out later what the heck to do with it.

Now having said all that, if any of you LJ's want to send me a gift then I would be most pleased and add you to my "Buddys" list as a gesture of thanks. Go for it


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

Cool idea Roger, what's your address? I got lots of sawdust to get rid of. LOL


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## mmh (Mar 17, 2008)

Hey, I only use ONE clamp for my canes! If it's over 36" long I'll take it! And as for the sawdust, if it's the right wood type, you can grow mushrooms in it. (Morels, truffles, oyster, ********************ake, etc.)

As for a dumb gift, I don't think I've yet received one related to woodworking, but I am getting a new Jet 48" belt & disc sander from Santa!

Here are some gifts I would consider pretty dumb:
Necktie with a picture of a hammer on it.
Singing rubber bass on wooden plaque.

Stay warm and make some sawdust!


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## papadan (Mar 6, 2009)

Uh Oh! Now you've done it! Nobody, and I mean NOBODY gets away with calling Big Mouth Billy Bass dumb! Except maybe you mmh. LOL


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## DaleM (Feb 18, 2009)

I showed my wife the picture of the B&D electric tape measure and told her it made the list. We had a good laugh because she bought me one of those three or four years ago.


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Thanks for all the great replies! It all begs the question: Does there exist a woodworker that *doesn't* have a wishlist of new items that he/she needs? In every price range?


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

poopiecat: Yes you seem to have had great replies.
Now I might be just the person you seek. I honestly do NOT have a gift or want list for myself, apart from continued success with my medications and friendships.
I can't really justify myself as a meaningful woodworker, it is a labor of therapy to me which I enjoy. I am trying to learn and and use the tools that I have to attempt to make simple things as I do not have any intentions of making some fabulous items which these very talented LJ's craft. I admire their talent and I admire the way they are willing to help me and answer my "stupid" questions and give me encouragement.
I suppose that when I am more capable and set my sights on a particular line of items I would like to make, then I would start a wish list for tools/items that I did not have and would help me in my selected item line.
I don't have ANY wish list of any kind, except the two free ones I mention.
I have all I need at this time.


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## Porosky (Mar 10, 2009)

Someone bought my wife a bamboo cutting board. It didn't last long in the house though. Hmmmm…. I wonder what happened to the board….Hmmm


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Poroskywood: Maybe somebody made a clock out of it?? 
Roger Clark…We all belong here, regardless of skill level. I too, have a good life primarily because of the meds I take for cardiac and diabetes issues, which continue to give me good years to enjoy with my wife and family.
Every day is a gift. But I know I'm getting a new floor-model drill press, and a wall-mounted shop-vac for Christmas! Wahoo! That's cuz the roll-top desk (posted in my projects) for my wife is JUST barely finished!! Life is sweet!


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

poopiecat:
Now you have made me have a wish list. I wish for a lot more "tomorrows" 
Enjoy your new Christmas gift "toys", you will redeem yourself with the roll top desk and can answer her constant question - "what do you do with all that time you spend in the shop"?
Christmas to me is a greater "family" gathering than Thanksgiving. To be around my family is a good Christmas to me.


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Now that you mentioned it, Roger…I'll say this: Years ago, at the age of 46, I had my first heart attack. Once back home, I moped around the house, figuring I was doomed. After all, my Dad dropped dead at 40 of a massive heart attack. Sitting in front of the TV all day, I watched an episode of Montel Williams, who was just going public with his diagnosis of MS, which he'd kept a secret to this point. He made reference to the profound, positive ways that MS changed his life, which I had trouble trying to wrap my mind around, until he started referring to MS as his "*Gift*"....and then I understood…to make my remaining years as relevant, meaningful, and worthwhile as I possibly could. Some simple words, but they changed my entire outlook on life!


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

So… I should have included a third category in my original post….that is, the gifts we want most, that represent the most meaningful and vital, perhaps not even costing anyone a cent. Some of us have already answered this question!


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## NathanAllen (Oct 16, 2009)

My wife went into a HF last week to pick up a new stand for my planer, as far as I'm concerned the trip was the gift.

Just this morning she complained about the smell of cosmoline lingering in her trunk.


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

poopiecat:
A similar transformation happened to me. When I was diagnosed with cancer the bottom dropped out my "invincibility", I was scared and angry. I had surgery which was almost successful as 2 notes were infected and the cancer could spread. So I am on a lot of meds that attempt to slow or halt its progress, and some have nasty side effects.
I decided to give up the anger and be more positive. Each day is never a wasted day now and all I want too do is present a caring and positive attitude to everyone, and to know that when my time comes, there won't be anyone out there who thinks ill of me.
I am actually a much better person since I found out I was not invincible.


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## dustygirl (Mar 11, 2008)

I treasure all homemade gifts that I have received over the years and I am sooooo grateful that people cared enough about me to take the time to make them.No matter how crazy they seem.(lol)


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Thanks, Dusty!
But that was far from a homemade gift. It was a freebie throwaway from a Porter-Cable marketing exec, to my step-father. Did I forget to mention that? Maybe you leap-frogged over some great posts!


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