# Things You Learn Living In The South



## juniorjock (Feb 3, 2008)

Thought some of you might get a laugh out of this. But, don't laugh too much, cause most of these are true…..

*THINGS YOU LEARN LIVING IN THE SOUTH *

A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.

There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.

If it growls, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

Onced and Twiced are words.

It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

Jawl-P? Means, Did you all go to the bathroom?

People actually grow,eat and like okra.

Fixinto is one word. It means I'm going to do that.

There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.

Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.

Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.

The word jeet is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'

You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.

Ya'll is singular. All ya'll is plural.

All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.

You carry jumper cables in your car - for your OWN car.

You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, Tabasco and ketchup.

The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, the motor sports, and gossip.

Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss(first name) or Mr.(first name)

You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

You know what a hissy fit is..

Fried catfish is the other white meat.

We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

JJ:

I was born and raised in the South, and have lived here all my life….I've heard just about every one of those sayings at one time or another….From my grandma, grandpa, mom, or pop….that's where I learned the English language….proper-like…..nothin' like kinfolk to show you the ropes…..lol. They are still oldies, but goodies…..


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## Karson (May 9, 2006)

I must be south by osmosis. They all ring true. Thanks Ya'll


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## RandyM68 (Jan 20, 2012)

I resemble that.


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## degoose (Mar 20, 2009)

Australian..a few similar types of questions.

Emma Chizet…. how much is it?

Can't cheer me…. can't you hear me?


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## juniorjock (Feb 3, 2008)

Rick, I bet if we tried we could come up with hundreds more.

degoose, come on now, I know you have more. We'd like to here them. Actually, I'd say that every part of the world has their own little way of saying things. But, I bet the south in the USA may be the hardest for others to understand.


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## fussy (Jan 18, 2010)

JJ,

Here's living (formerly) proof of #1.

Steve


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## juniorjock (Feb 3, 2008)

Dayyyumnn. Good one Steve.


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## fussy (Jan 18, 2010)

JJ,

This is what you use if your wife has the 4-wheeler.

Steve


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## gfadvm (Jan 13, 2011)

That probably explains why I need an interpreter when I do a speaking gig in the North!


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## mtenterprises (Jan 10, 2011)

Ayup!
MIKE


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## CharlesNeil (Oct 21, 2007)

well it's no secret which language I speak, sheeeeeeeee it, It's the language given to those who were so graciously blessed to be born in the South, but we do try hard to Like the rest of y'all ,


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

JJ:
I was raised on red beans, taters, and cornbread, with a big raw oinion….and sweet tea…..down here in the South they are called "vittles"....Mama always put a little "fatback" in the beans, or a big hamhock….When you're done with the vittles, it's time for a big slice of chocolate cake…..with buttermilk…

Down here we run "tars" on our cars and trucks…..when I was little used to get a "whooping" with a razor strap…...and you check the "awl" in your truck to see if it is low….


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## juniorjock (Feb 3, 2008)

It was about the same here, Rick. Red beans, green beans, soup beans….. every kind of bean you could think of. No one said anything if there wasn't any meat on the table. There was plenty of other good stuff. I think my grandmaw cooked for the entire neighborhood. We never knew who was going to be there. I think you came out better on the whoopin's. My dad used his belt. None of his belts were over 1/2" to 3/4" wide. I would have stripes all over the back of my legs. My Mom used her hand up until the time she hurt herself while whoppin' me. After that…. I had to go out in the yard and cut a switch out of a tree and take it to her. I'll say this though, I never got a whoopin' that I didn't deserve.


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## gfadvm (Jan 13, 2011)

Rick, You're making me hungry and I just ate! There is nothing better than crawfish and gumbo with some red beans and rice on the side.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

gfadvm:

I really like hot, spicy boiled crawfish, peel-em-and eat-em shrimp, and gumbo (shrimp) with the little taters, little ears of corn, and more spice…The best place to get that grub is in Louisana…the red beans and rice ain't bad, either….lol. But you just can't beat good home cooking…like mine, most grandmas and mommas were the best cooks…...Sure wish I had a big ole bowl of cornbread a cabbage with a bowl of etouffee….


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

There is nothing better than a Chicken Fried Steak, Fully Loaded Baked Potata and Tons of Country Gravy and maybe a Jalapeno Cornmeal Muffin with Butter on the side.


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## JollyGreen67 (Nov 1, 2010)

HEY Y'ALL - - - - - WATCHISS !


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## juniorjock (Feb 3, 2008)

Good one jim. But its even better if its "hold my beer and watchiss!".


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## Pimzedd (Jan 22, 2007)

I was in Kansas City talking to a bunch of students and teachers from around the nation. I said something about being glad to help them do something. One of the kids politely asked, "What does hep mean?" I had to interpret for him. Oh yea, I'm from Texas.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

My wife and I were at a "welcome to the neighborhood" party that the Mayor set up for us when we moved to Arkansas…A bunch of folks were there, and a guy asked me how I was feeling…I told him I was a litte "stove up" with my back pain, and this Yankee lady ask me if that means "do you need a bowl movemnet?"....I went for another snack.


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## CharlieM1958 (Nov 7, 2006)

The difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?

The northern zoo has a sign on every cage telling where the animal comes from and other information about it. At a southern zoo, the signs just have recipes.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

What's the difference between a Northern girl and a Southern girl…..?

A Northern girl has a canopy over her bed….. A Southern girl has a canopy under her bed…..


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## DIYaholic (Jan 28, 2011)

CharlieM1958,
*ROFLMAO!!!!*


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## fussy (Jan 18, 2010)

What's the difference between Northern Baptists and Southern Baptists? The Northern Baptists say, "There ain't no Hell!" The Southern Baptists say, "The hell they ain't!"

Steve

PS Directions are different in the south. When delivering furniture for my Dad in the mountains of E. Kentucky
I would ask where the guy lived. I would get something like, "We live four miles this side of Napiers store." How the heck do you know when you're four miles THIS Side of Napier's store?


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Down here in the South, if you ask someone where a place is, they tell you "it's down the road a piece".

People say "I'll be there in a spell".....and ya'll come back real soon, ya hear?

Kids are called young-uns, and the rest of your aunts, uncles, and cousins is your kinfolk…...no s…


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## CharlesNeil (Oct 21, 2007)

here is a woodworking one, or 3 or 4

catywhompased ( cat e whomp (like chomp) esed ( issst), means it is all messed up, out of square and whatever , might be a tad out or even a smidgen but if its as much as a scoush " then the sum Bi*** is fubared , and you can translate that one yerself


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Good one, Charlies…..I've heard that all my life, too…...

When we hear a kid or a woman crying, we call that "catterwallin", or you say "Quit that bawling, or I'm "fixin" to give you something to bawl about" (just to the kids).....

We also call tires "tars" or "casons".......


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

As you know, I have lived in Texas since 1977 and have never lost my London Brit dialect. I have a lot of fum with Texas accents the local people use and their "slang". I sometimes give them a puzzled look when they say something "country" and respond with "Why don't you speak proper, like wot I do?" always gets a laugh.
I'll be *fixin* to post this now *over yonder* and later have a *mess* of beans. *seeyer*


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Roger"

Here in the South, we don't have an* "accent*"...we have a* "drawl"....*The Yankees have the accent…..

And as you stated, people* "across the pond*" have dialects…...I like to hear people from there talk…it's neat.


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Rick, If I really want to make the local folks confused, I speak Cockney.


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## Builder_Bob (Jan 9, 2010)

It's just an RCH shy.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Builder_ Bob:

It took me a couple of seconds to figure that one out, but I got it…...lol..


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Roger:

It's hard enough to figure out sometimes what a Limey is saying, but a Cockney is even worse….they do have a real serious accent….I think it's an accent…..I'm not real shore…..!!


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Rick, they have their own language. See if you can understand what I mean when I say. I need a pony, where's the Karzi?


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## CharlieM1958 (Nov 7, 2006)

I need a ride, where's the car?


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

A flimm, a Tosheroon, a Ton and a Sprarzi. Those are all cockney names for money - bills and coins.


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Thought you had a truck Charlie


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

or is "car" Cajun for "truck ?


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

Roger:

No wonder I never knew what they were talking about…And I thought Greek was hard…I'd need an interpreter if I went there…They sure are thick-tongued…it is an entirely different language…....I've watched a few movies with Cockneys in them, and that actor Bob Hoskins is the worse I ever heard when it comes to trying to understand him….or maybe it's just his acting roles….don't know, but he sure can speak it….


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

OK Rick, this is what I said in English this time: Cockney is rhyming slang, the sentence or phrase contains the key word which often rhymes with another word; Pony is "pony and trap" with *trap* being the get rhyming word with "crap". A Karzi is one of the cockney names for a toilet, another is "long drop". Yet another name for a pony is "a how's your father" 
Now do you understand what the question was?


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## chrisstef (Mar 3, 2010)

I think the rest of us New Englanders should throw out "things you learn living in the N'englan" ... the small little differences crack me up.

"bang a Louie" (making a left hand turn)
"hang a Ralph" (make a right hand turn)
"throw some jimmies on that cone" (sprinkles please)
"wicked pissah" (multiple meanings)
"grinder, hoagie, sub" (depending where your from up here but theyre all the same)


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## Roger Clark aka Rex (Dec 30, 2008)

Cockney Rhyming Slang comes from Cockneys who were born withing the sound of Bow's church bells in East London. Cockneys were always ferocious street market traders and they developed the Cockney language so that the customers (punters) could not decipher what Cockney traders were talking to each other about - like telling each other what they quoted a price on to a customer etc.


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## Rick Dennington (Aug 27, 2009)

When we're gonna go to someones house,or meet someone we say…"We'll be over there "dreckly"...(meaning directly, or I'll see you soon)
When someone is a little "tetched" in the head, they are "''bout a half bubble off plum".....
And we're looking for a "thang-a-ma-jig" for a whats'it".......


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