# What would YOU have said?



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

The Farmers Truck got hit by a Semi that was in the wrong! He sued them and went to court.

The Lawyer for the trucking company was having a hard time trying to get him to answer a Question. The Farmer was trying to explain something that happened at the accident.

The Judge let him continue. This cleared it all up!

LINK: 




Hope you enjoy it. I agree with the Farmer …LOL…

Regards: Rick


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

ROFL


----------



## LittleShaver (Sep 14, 2016)

Thanks for starting my day with a laugh.


----------



## dbray45 (Oct 19, 2010)

Seriously funny. Have to agree with the farmer.


----------



## GR8HUNTER (Jun 13, 2016)

some days i feel that bad i just might let him shoot me :<((


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

Thanks for your Replies Guys! Much Appreciated!

Rick


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> some days i feel that bad i just might let him shoot me :<((
> 
> - GR8HUNTER


NO! NO! NO! Tony! Don't Forget* " REMEMBER TO ALWAYS HAVE FUN."* ;-}

Rick


----------



## AlaskaGuy (Jan 29, 2012)

I'd asked the officer if the laws allows you to soot my animal with my permission.


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> I d asked the officer if the laws allows you to soot my animal with my permission.
> 
> - AlaskaGuy


Good Question AG! I would think that he would need his Permission. It doesn't sound like he did that Not sure though?


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

Getting Old:

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells remain FOREVER.


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

I used the Iraqi Weight loss method. Went to work in Iraq, outside in the 120F heat 16 hours a day. To help the process wore armored vest. Walked everywhere not matter the distance. Moderate workouts each evening and a eating partner that was next to me in chow line saying "yes" or "no" to any potential choices.

Went Jan 2018, 225 lbs, returned August 2010, 175 lbs. Doctor visit last month, still 175 lbs.

LOL


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> I used the Iraqi Weight loss method. Went to work in Iraq, outside in the 120F heat 16 hours a day. To help the process wore armored vest. Walked everywhere not matter the distance. Moderate workouts each evening and a eating partner that was next to me in chow line saying "yes" or "no" to any potential choices.
> 
> Went Jan 2018, 225 lbs, returned August 2010, 175 lbs. Doctor visit last month, still 175 lbs.
> 
> - woodbutcherbynight


Sounds like a Hell of a Plan to me! Not my Cup Of Tea though. ..LOL..

Rick


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

7 years maintaining that weight is pretty good i would of found every pound i lost after a year or two being back


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

> Sounds like a Hell of a Plan to me! Not my Cup Of Tea though. ..LOL..
> 
> Rick
> 
> - Rick


Well it is not for everyone. Of course getting shot, blown up and having pins in my wrist and arm was not exactly part of my original plan.

LOL



> 7 years maintaining that weight is pretty good i would of found every pound i lost after a year or two being back
> 
> - corelz125


Key is to push back when your body says full. Also fast food is NOT a part of my daily diet. Wife cooks for me everyday.


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

Not being full is something my body rarely tells me it usually says yea we got room for that


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

Great Replies Guys! Thanks! It does make a difference!


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

> Not being full is something my body rarely tells me it usually says yea we got room for that
> 
> - corelz125


LOL well a trick I was taught by a medic is to drink two bottles of water BEFORE you eat. This fills the stomach up and triggers the I am full reaction. It works, mostly… LOL


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> Not being full is something my body rarely tells me it usually says yea we got room for that
> 
> - corelz125
> 
> ...


YEP! I was taught the same thing! It works!

Thanks Buddy!


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

I guess after the 2 bottles of water you forget about eating and start peeing. =) I usually eat then drink after I guess i should reverse that


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

A 90-year-old man goes for a physical and all of his tests come back normal.
The doctor says, "Larry, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"
Larry replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so He's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, poof! The light goes on. When I'm done, poof! The light goes off."
"Wow, that's incredible," the doctor says.
A little later in the day, the doctor calls Larry's wife.
"Bonnie," he says, "Larry is doing fine! But I had to call you because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night, and poof, the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done, poof, the light goes off?"
"Oh sweet Jesus", exclaims Bonnie. "He's peeing in the refrigerator again!"


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

*"Oh sweet Jesus", exclaims Bonnie. "He's peeing in the refrigerator again!"*

LMAO Corelz! Good One!


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

> *"Oh sweet Jesus", exclaims Bonnie. "He's peeing in the refrigerator again!"*
> 
> LMAO Corelz! Good One!
> 
> - Rick


ROFLMAO


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

The president, tired of his low approval ratings, called up the head of the CIA and said, "I want your very best agent over here first thing in the morning."

Moments later, a call went out to the Middle East, and the most gifted American agent was headed back to Washington.
The next morning, the agent was escorted into the Oval Office. The president said, "I hear you're the best in the business. I can't trust what my staff tells me. So I want you to visit every state in the union, every major city. I want you to stay out on the road until you have an idea of what the vast majority of Americans would like to see happen in the Oval Office. Understand?" 
The CIA agent responded affirmatively. He left the White House and wasn't heard from for nearly four months. Finally, he showed up early on a Saturday morning, and the president saw him immediately.
The president said, "Did you find out what an overwhelming majority of Americans want done here in this office?" 
"Yes, sir." 
"Well, then, express the will of the people," the president ordered.
So the agent stood up, made a fist, and punched him in the nose.


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

Good One Corelz!


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

I come across a few good ones now and then. I'll post them since you like a good joke Rick


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> I come across a few good ones now and then. I ll post them since you like a good joke Rick
> 
> - corelz125


Thanks Corelz. That's very considerate of You. A Good Laugh never hurt anyone!

Regards: Rick


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

A four-year-old little boy was at the doctor's office with his mother in the waiting room when he spotted a pregnant lady on the other side of the room. Having nothing better to do, he walked over to her and inquisitively asked, "Why is your stomach so big?" 
She replied, "I'm having a baby." 
With big eyes, he replied, "Is the baby in your stomach?" 
She said, "He sure is." 
Then the little boy, with a puzzled look on his face, asked yet another question: "Is it a good baby?" 
She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby." At this point the woman was thinking the little boy was incredibly cute and looked forward to what he had to say next.
And, much to her surprise, with an even more surprised and shocked look than before, he asked, "Then why did you eat him?"

Rick your a leafs fan?


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

Good one Corelz!

No. Not a follower of any particular sports (Weird, Huh) unless it's a Special Event like the Olympics.

Are You?


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

After a slow day at work I needed that one, good one Corelz!

ROFLMAO


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> After a slow day at work I needed that one, good one Corelz!
> 
> ROFLMAO
> 
> - woodbutcherbynight


Thanks for responding "WB"! Unfortunately it's not something that happens all that often.

Good for YOU! Kiss. Kiss. ....LOL…

Rick


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

I follow hockey this is a great time of year for it. Maybe a little odd a Canadian doesn't follow hockey


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> I follow hockey this is a great time of year for it. Maybe a little odd a Canadian doesn t follow hockey
> 
> - corelz125


NOT ODD At All! I use to go with my Dad all of the time. He had Season Tickets for The Leafs at Maple Leaf Gardens He passed away Many Years Ago after a 2 year Battle with Cancer. when I was only 21 years old. I still watch the Games at the Pub, if they're playing.

Now. If you want to talk FISHING! ...LOL…

Rick


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

I been talking fishing the past few weeks with friends. Looking to get out in a few weeks if it ever stops snowing here. WB always good to get a good laugh at the end of most days


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

Fishing is also good at the end of most days! ...lol…


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

Two wives go out for girls' night.
Both got drunk, started walking home and had to go to the bathroom. They stopped at a cemetery but had nothing to wipe with. One used her panties and the other grabbed a wreath off a grave. The next morning, one husband calls the other and says
"No more girls' night out. My wife came back with no panties." 
"You think you have it bad?" says the other, "Mine came back with a card stuck in her crack that read 'from all of us at the fire station… we will never forget you."


----------



## woodbutcherbynight (Oct 21, 2011)

> Two wives go out for girls night.
> Both got drunk, started walking home and had to go to the bathroom. They stopped at a cemetery but had nothing to wipe with. One used her panties and the other grabbed a wreath off a grave. The next morning, one husband calls the other and says
> "No more girls night out. My wife came back with no panties."
> "You think you have it bad?" says the other, "Mine came back with a card stuck in her crack that read from all of us at the fire station… we will never forget you."
> ...


ROFL


----------



## Magnum (Feb 5, 2010)

> Two wives go out for girls night.
> Both got drunk, started walking home and had to go to the bathroom. They stopped at a cemetery but had nothing to wipe with. One used her panties and the other grabbed a wreath off a grave. The next morning, one husband calls the other and says
> "No more girls night out. My wife came back with no panties."
> "You think you have it bad?" says the other, "Mine came back with a card stuck in her crack that read from all of us at the fire station… we will never forget you."
> ...


Now THAT ONE is the Best so far! *" "Mine came back with a card stuck in her crack that read from all of us at the fire station… we will never forget you." LMAO Corelz!*

Regards: Rick


----------



## corelz125 (Sep 23, 2015)

Theres another one i have to see if i can find it thats another good one.


----------

