# Ms. Debbie P being investigated



## MrWoody (Jan 25, 2008)

Ms. Debbie P, Douglas Bordner, and host of the popular website LumberJocks, Martin Sojka, are being investigated by a joint operation of the FBI, CIA, Homeland Security, RCMP, CSIS and Interpol.
They are suspected of being a terrorist group trying to take over the Woodworking World.
It is alleged they are recruiting through their "Shop Tours".
As a result of the investigation the RCMP has alerted several other Canadian Ministries.
The Ministry of Health has announced they will be investigating baby gates, highchairs, desks and toys that may or may not meet safty standards and charges are likely because all have been made without proper permits.
The ASPCA and Canadian SPCA have joined to follow up on complaints of several species of birds, animals, including White Rabbits being unlawfully confined. (Painted Black Walnut ?).
I will present more as facts become available.

*All persons named are guilty until proven innocent*

Tongue firmly planted in cheek.
Happy Easter


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## rikkor (Oct 17, 2007)

I can hardly wait for April 1.


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## toyguy (Nov 23, 2007)

MY MY MY… IF it was only the RCMP, I would say not to worry. 
Nice visit with you and Jo last night, however I kind of think maybe you just have too much time on your hands, better get back in the shop.


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## dennis (Aug 3, 2006)

My tax dollars at work…just makes me Proud!


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

after the blood started flowing again I thought "someone has too much time on their hands".. haha

those darned rabbits!! curses


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## RAH (Oct 14, 2007)

Let's start a defense fund, some where in here I have already put in my 2 cents.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

haha well.. 3600 LumberJocks each tossing in their 2 cents = hmmm $72 dollars???

I feel safe already!


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## boboswin (May 23, 2007)

Nobody with math skills like Ms. Debbie will ever get convicted! <vbg>

Bob


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## odie (Nov 20, 2007)

Ms.Deb, Are you sure you're not blond ?


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

I do wear my hat for a reason


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## mrtrim (Oct 11, 2007)

mr woody will now be brought up on charges himself for outing a cwia agent in the process of a stakeout ! 
(central walnut intel. agency ) ive been tailing ms. debbie for some months in lew of charges brought forth by one 'chip from deleware " that she did in fact paint some walnut . im also looking into the dissapearence of the plaintiff to see if has been placed in the walnut wittness protectiion program or possibly been "done in " by the defendant ! little is it know that jimmy hoffa also accused her of this offense also and hes not been seen lately .


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## motthunter (Dec 31, 2007)

call me naive… but I think that this is not necessarily completely true. well.. maybe it is… hmmmm I will have to think about it


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

((wiping sweat from my brow))

I don't what's become of Chip.. but I did find my snowman bound and gagged this morning!!!


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## dennis (Aug 3, 2006)

better call the spcs


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## Betsy (Sep 25, 2007)

I'm thinking MsDebbie and Doug have the most to worry about - Martin is out of the jurisdiction of the RCMP and probably could fight extradition.

With gas prices the way they are--- I've only got 1 Cent to contribute, its your's though if you need it. Sorry Ms. Debbie and Doug.


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## 2 (Feb 26, 2006)

uh.. I better put $2 into the defense fund… not just 2 cents lol


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

hey Martin… will that cover my lawyer fees or is that just for Slovakian aid?


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## Zuki (Mar 28, 2007)

MrTrim . . . did you say that MsD painted walnut?????

Pls say it's not true !!!!


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## 33706 (Mar 5, 2008)

Heehee I'm laughing now, but in Canada there is indeed a Government agency whose sole purpose is to issue advisories about uninspected, unapproved cribs, toys and other SECOND HAND goods purchased at yard sales that might not conform to current safety standards! I'm not kidding, there are often half-page advertisements about swallowing hazards, sleepwear that is flammable, car seats, items with toxic finishes, ad nauseam!! Our tax money at work. Heck, you can't even 'import' a vehicle into Canada if it doesn't have the approved anchors for an infant seat. 
So, I almost believed the original post right from the get-go!!


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## Radish (Apr 11, 2007)

I'm secure within the perimeters of my Coiled Extension Cord Claymore defense system. No one can touch me.
TOP OF THE WORLD, MAW! Come and get me coppers! Mwawahahahahahaha!

oh, and Happy Easter one and all.


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## CharlieM1958 (Nov 7, 2006)

This is bull. Everyone knows Ms. Debbie is an undercover agent with the RCMP. That's why she can travel the globe on a moments notice to conduct those surprise shop inspections.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

yes.. and remember all that old-growth wood that was being hauled across the border and I was hanging onto the underside of the truck??
Those guys are in SUCH big trouble!!


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## MrWoody (Jan 25, 2008)

I guess it's time I addressed a few of the comments posted here.

*Mr Trim:* 1- I'm claiming freedom of the press, and free speech.
2- I never mentioned your surveillance nor Chip from Delaware, you did.
3- I asked about the supposed painted walnut. *Did she really paint walnut?*
FYI. Mr. Hoffa is being held in protective custody by Homeland Security at Guantanamo Bay :^)

*Ms Debbie:* The picture proves nothing. We don't know how old it is. 
*Did you really paint walnut?*

*Douglas Bordner:* They felt safe at Waco! *Did Ms Debbie really paint walnut?*

*CharlieM1958:* 1- Being an agent for the RCMP is probably the worst thing she could use for defence.
The RCMP has many problems of it's own right now and would probably deny any knowledge of Ms Debbie.
2- Her trips are what prompted the investigation. The Taxman was curiuos how she could afford them.
3- *Did Ms Debbie paint Walnut?*


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## Karson (May 9, 2006)

You ask if Ms DebbieP ever painted walnut.

Here it is in her own words.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

well.. I am just a newbie to all this woodworking stuff and can't tell one type of wood from another.. so really I have no idea what type of wood it is. The label "Walnut" was just hearsay.

The snowman was made from a piece of scrap wood, rescued from the firewood pile…. Scrap wood… saved it .. gave it a new life…

waaaaaaaaaaaaaah


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## Dadoo (Jun 23, 2007)

I'll tell you guys this…Her and Douggy came and did a shop inspection at my place, and took all my beer! And they molested me too. I mean, at least Americans give you a beer before molesting you! And don't let that Douggy fool you! He says he's from Omaha, Nebraska but he's origonally from…Canada! And they also "painted" all of my stock walnut!

Weeks later my wife found me wandering aimlessly. I had been in a daze for that long. But my therapist says I'm getting better. We had to burn all that walnut. Nothing gets that Canadian paint out. It was such a sad event.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

Martin.. how's that security fund coming along???


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## CharlieM1958 (Nov 7, 2006)

Dadoo, those beer-pilfering Canadians will stop at nothing! I know Doug's not drinking it, but he might be selling it on the black market to finance all that high-priced terrorist software he's running.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

and what about this??? I get my advice from my fellow LumberJocks!


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## 2 (Feb 26, 2006)

Fund is coming together.. I'm tossing adding another $2! ... to save our Debbie007


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## Blake (Oct 17, 2007)

I have never heard any of the names listed above. I know nothing.


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## Greg3G (Mar 20, 2007)

Will that be US or Canadian $ ?

I met a few of those Canadian guys while I was in the Army. Sneeky bunch. All they did was talk Hockey and drink my beer.

This reminds me of the Red Green show on PBS….Welcome to Possum Lodge. If I'm not mistaken, they ran into trouble with the law on occation too. Must be the long winters and lack of sunshine.


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## Greg3G (Mar 20, 2007)

BTW …Ms Debbie, I think you past "Newbie" about 5000 posts ago


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## Thuan (Dec 12, 2007)

I think Ms Debbie alluded that she burns Walnut.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

not me…. I just save the wood.


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## unclesam (Mar 25, 2008)

I too


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## lazyfiremaninTN (Jul 30, 2007)

Hmmmm…..the guilty ones always plead ignorance and make excuses. I for one think that Ms Debbi said "To heck with them" and laughed evilly as she painted that walnut.


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## Radish (Apr 11, 2007)

Thanks, Charlie for defending me against scurrilous Internet relapse charges. Now I have to worry about some search engine bot from the Department of Homeland Security. Photoshop is about as radical as it gets around here, but then you can get into a lot of trouble with that if you've a mind to.

Dadoo, Bud, you gotta crack the garage door. Working with all those solvents is turning your brain all mushy.


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## lazyfiremaninTN (Jul 30, 2007)

Don't listen to him gang…...He's a Corn Husker….....BOOMER SOONER


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## Radish (Apr 11, 2007)

Adrian, if anything I'm a Jayhawk. *Rock Chalk Jayhawk K.U.* But mostly LJs is the only kind of jock I am.

When I moved up here, my wife-to-be practically had to haul me out of a grocery store steps ahead of the lynch mob because I innocently asked aloud who Tom Osborne was.


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## johnt (May 9, 2007)

Me thinks someone is smoking their sawdust. Was that tongue in cheek or tongue in groove. Good luck with the Mounties their hearts are made of hard wood and they always get their terrorist. JohnT


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

I think i'll go hole up in my igloo!


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## Brad_Nailor (Jul 26, 2007)

I hear John is being investigated by the same department for serious bird housing violations, like not providing proper plumbing, electric and adequate exit markings in his birdhouses…


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

hahaa yah, a birdhouse that size might just catch the attention of some government official with extra time on his hands


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## pyromedic602 (Feb 20, 2008)

I have now officially locked my walnut up and placed laser quided protection all around to protect it from any mis guided paint.


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## Sawdust2 (Mar 18, 2007)

Walnut -Willow Hmmm Same number of letters.

She's been disguising her walnut as willow.
Or has she been disguising her willow as walnut.

Ya know, I haven't seen any willow around lately.

Lee


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

you mean walnut isn't willow??

Hey Douglas… have we been to Pyromedic's for a shop tour yet? I think we should arrange one


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## pyromedic602 (Feb 20, 2008)

Ms Debbie you are welcome anytime. I just hope that I can get it completed some time soon. not much to look at right now. you know with all my wood in protective custody and all.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

haha ooooh the temptation!!


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## Radish (Apr 11, 2007)

I'll warm up the tour bus, Oh, Illustrious Director of Inspections.
I owe lechevaldubois his tour, which I'll have done this weekend. Just a heads up so he will be in the e-zine…

Then, pyromedic602 you're up next. Get some good shots of your workshop posted, and if need be I can arrange the laser protection…



Good ole Mot… I know he's around here somewhere.


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## MsDebbieP (Jan 4, 2007)

do I need to get some protective clothing or anything? Special glasses?? Or is it just a can of something to spray on the lasers?


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## pyromedic602 (Feb 20, 2008)

I will be able to start loading my shop soon. I am expecting the final electrical inspection with in the next week. Hopefully! Humm just wondering do the new lasers need to be installed before or after the inspection.


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## Pretzel (Feb 23, 2008)

As Douglas claims to be from Omaha, do i need to upgrade my security system? What do they travel in? Night vision security? Lately I have noticed 2 pieces of walnut & 1 can of latex paint missing from my shop. Ayyye!!


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