Male or Female?

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Forum topic by Karson posted 08-21-2009 09:55 PM 1685 views 0 times favorited 21 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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35126 posts in 4430 days

08-21-2009 09:55 PM

Topic tags/keywords: humor

You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples:

”FREEZER BAGS:” They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

”PHOTOCOPIERS:” These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again.
They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

”TIRES:” Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.

”HOT AIR BALLOONS:” Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their bottom.

”SPONGES:” These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water..(ain’t that the truth)

”WEB PAGES:” Female, because they’re constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

”TRAINS:” Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

”EGG TIMERS:” Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.

”HAMMERS:” Male, because in the last 5000 years, they’ve hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.

”THE REMOTE CONTROL:” Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying.

”New Law:”

With the high rate of attacks on women in secluded parking lots, especially during evening hours, the Minneapolis City Council has established a ‘Women Only’ parking lot at the Mall of America. Even the parking lot attendants are exclusively female so that a comfortable and safe environment is created for patrons.

Below is the first picture available of this world-first women-only parking lot in Minnesota

-- I've been blessed with a father who liked to tinker in wood, and a wife who lets me tinker in wood. Southern Delaware soon moving to Virginia †

21 replies so far

View CharlieM1958's profile


16275 posts in 4248 days

#1 posted 08-21-2009 10:01 PM

”TIRES:” Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.

I resemble that remark!

-- Charlie M. "Woodworking - patience = firewood"

View PurpLev's profile


8536 posts in 3678 days

#2 posted 08-21-2009 10:10 PM

haha, so good. (both of you)

-- ㊍ When in doubt - There is no doubt - Go the safer route.

View pommy's profile


1697 posts in 3720 days

#3 posted 08-21-2009 11:03 PM

Charlie i think we both the butt of that joke LOL….....


-- cut it saw it scrap it SKPE: ANDREW.CARTER69

View cypresswoodworker's profile


89 posts in 3376 days

#4 posted 08-21-2009 11:37 PM

I’m still pressing all the wrong buttons ! And the tire is becomming over inflated. Still ain’t bald just losing all the color !

-- If at first you don't succeed...Buy another tool !!

View Bureaucrat's profile


18339 posts in 3681 days

#5 posted 08-22-2009 01:39 AM

Dresser: Female, according to Cream in the 70’s they said a woman is like a dresser, someone is always going through their drawers.

-- Gary D. Stoughton, WI

View a1Jim's profile


117128 posts in 3606 days

#6 posted 08-22-2009 03:14 AM

Funny stuff

-- wood crafting & woodworking classes

View cabinetmaster's profile


10874 posts in 3587 days

#7 posted 08-22-2009 03:35 AM

ROFLMAO…...............Thanks Karson and Bozo for the laughs. I needed that after today…........LOL

-- Jerry--A man can never have enough tools or clamps

View Loucarb's profile


2388 posts in 3474 days

#8 posted 08-22-2009 04:17 AM

Perfect to bring a smile after a long week. Thanks

View kolwdwrkr's profile


2821 posts in 3619 days

#9 posted 08-22-2009 04:48 AM

These are hilariously accurate. LOL

-- ~ Inspiring those who inspire me ~

View mmh's profile


3677 posts in 3751 days

#10 posted 08-22-2009 05:18 AM

Very funny! Hey, I’m feeling spongy . . .

-- "They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." ~ Edgar Allan Poe

View mtnwild's profile


3474 posts in 3556 days

#11 posted 08-22-2009 05:52 AM

Funny, thanks for that…..................

-- mtnwild (Jack), It's not what you see, it's how you see it.

View jeffthewoodwacker's profile


603 posts in 3833 days

#12 posted 08-23-2009 02:07 AM

Very funny.

-- Those that say it can't be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.

View Dusty56's profile


11819 posts in 3717 days

#13 posted 08-23-2009 02:28 AM

Thanks for the humor , Karson : )

-- I'm absolutely positive that I couldn't be more uncertain!

View sharad's profile


1117 posts in 3834 days

#14 posted 08-23-2009 08:21 AM

Karson, you are definitely a male because you have a sense of humor.

-- “If someone feels that they had never made a mistake in their life, then it means they have never tried a new thing in their life”.-Albert Einstein

View FlWoodRat's profile


732 posts in 3938 days

#15 posted 08-23-2009 01:07 PM

Karson, VERY FUNNY. Thanks for posting it.

”Light Bulb” Mixed Gender: Male because it’s easy to turn on. Female because it’s bright!

-- I love the smell of sawdust in the morning....

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