(O.T.) Puppies & kitties cause 86,000 falls a year! Time for OSHA to step in!

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Forum topic by Planeman posted 03-27-2009 08:11 PM 1547 views 0 times favorited 15 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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97 posts in 3814 days

03-27-2009 08:11 PM

Topic tags/keywords: humor

According to the CDC Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report ( puppies and kitties cause 86,000 falls a year! Obviously this carnage needs to be regulated and laws should be enacted. OSHA needs to step in a and put a stop to this! But we citizens should step in and help OSHA and the State of California to come up with the laws, rules, and regulations so I am asking our fellow Lumberjocks to propose laws, rules and regulations.

(For those who are blind to satire and humor, this is to have a little fun and lighten the day for us Lumberjocks. Have at it guys!)


-- Always remember half of the people in this country are below average.

15 replies so far

View PurpLev's profile


8548 posts in 3885 days

#1 posted 03-27-2009 08:34 PM

All house people should be kept on a leash

-- ㊍ When in doubt - There is no doubt - Go the safer route.

View Gary's profile


9386 posts in 3669 days

#2 posted 03-27-2009 10:40 PM

I agree with Purp and, anyone living in a house with puppies and kitties should be mandated to wear bells on their shoes!

-- Gary, DeKalb Texas only 4 miles from the mill

View Rustic's profile


3255 posts in 3832 days

#3 posted 03-27-2009 11:19 PM

cats rule dogs drool. I have 2 cat’s. one is all white and the other is calico. The calico is always underfoot.

--, Rick Kruse, Grand Rapids, MI

View CharlieM1958's profile


16281 posts in 4455 days

#4 posted 03-27-2009 11:20 PM

Collars with flashing lights and beeping back-up signals?

-- Charlie M. "Woodworking - patience = firewood"

View Herbiej's profile


66 posts in 3589 days

#5 posted 03-28-2009 12:10 AM

All homes housing felines and canines shall have floors covered in a minimum of 12 inches of foam rubber and shall wear dot approved crash helmets, shoulder and knee protection, safety glasses and steel toe shoes. A siren and flashing white strobe lights is recommended but not mandatory at this time.

-- Acts: 2:38

View kiwi1969's profile


608 posts in 3678 days

#6 posted 03-28-2009 12:32 AM

I got my chinese cat cheap. When I got it home it had a strong smell of formaldyhide. It was so bad we had to vacate the house. Next time I will buy one from Mexico.

-- if the hand is not working it is not a pure hand

View mmh's profile


3677 posts in 3958 days

#7 posted 03-28-2009 12:57 AM

When walking around the house, take off your shoes and shuffle so you don’t step on anyone. Make sure you use your turn signal so they know where you are going and can run or lay in front of you. It makes great comic for their boring day to see you scamper and jump out of their way.

I have to buy neon colored catnip mice because the realistic colored ones made me think something was caught and left dead as an offering. That encounter can wake you up in the morning faster than a cup of java.

One of my two cats, Buck, likes to come down to the basement wood workshop and will nag me to stop what I’m doing until I pick him up. He will also do this when he wants me to go upstairs and watch TV so he can lay across my legs. I guess he wants to make sure he knows where I am.

Usually the noise of the shop vacs will scare him upstairs, but not always. The sawdust doesn’t always make those dirty looks go away either. And don’t bend over to pick something up, as he’ll jump on your back and get comfy. Who owns who here anyway???

-- "They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." ~ Edgar Allan Poe

View Big_Bob's profile


173 posts in 3945 days

#8 posted 03-28-2009 04:39 AM


You do not live in California! In California we have a Governator. What people in California know is our Governator is like kitty cat and all our government is always under foot.
Therefore, we can not have any kind of law controling them.

-- Bob Clark, Tool Collector and Sawdust Maker

View rtb's profile


1101 posts in 3949 days

#9 posted 03-28-2009 06:23 AM

I must speak up on behalf of our 4 legged friends. MMH, nobody owns a cat, even if you only have 2 you should still know that by now. Charlie you can put anything on a cat that you care to, if the cat doesn’t like you will find it somewhere other than on the cat. want to have fun ? Try putting it back on after the cat has passed judgement on it. (hint: its probably worthwhile to have someone with a knowledge of first aid standing by) Dogs: who think that you were invented to be a play toy They will run circles around you trip you up or knock you down and then stand on your chest and wash your face with theirs which will still have remnants of used kitty litter from their most recent search for “kitty cookies”. Oh yes because we are involved in animal rescue, we currently housing 5 dogs and 24 cats.

-- RTB. stray animals are just looking for love

View oldskoolmodder's profile


801 posts in 3916 days

#10 posted 03-28-2009 07:24 AM

Kiwi, those aren’t cat’s in Mexico, thems’ Jaguars! Well, at least they’re the size of dogs. ;)

I haven’t owned dogs for a while and as already posted, cats own you, I know our two cats own us. Though the male cat is like Paris Hilton, an attention you know what that never let’s you pet the female without trying to squeeze in for his lovin’ too.

-- Respect your shop tools and they will respect you - Ric

View LesB's profile


1916 posts in 3679 days

#11 posted 03-28-2009 07:48 AM

I think you need to take this up with PETA and the SPCA. Sounds like animal abuse to me (-;

-- Les B, Oregon

View dennis mitchell's profile

dennis mitchell

3994 posts in 4551 days

#12 posted 03-28-2009 03:29 PM

Just typical propaganda from the political backrooms created by the politicians who are bought and sold by lobbyist. This is nothing more than a smoke screen to keep people from dealing with the real danger in their homes. Yes I’m talking about small children. The medical industry makes billions off of these pests. They charge you to deliver them. Every time they sneeze. Let alone the slips and falls caused by toys. The toy manufactures are in on it too! We are unsafe in our own homes and Washington does nothing!

View kolwdwrkr's profile


2821 posts in 3826 days

#13 posted 03-28-2009 06:54 PM

I agree with Dennis Mitchell. Keep the pets, regulate the kids. They are unsafe not only because they leave toys laying around to trip over but the screams are deafoning and will cause a loss of hearing if the proper protection is not used. Cats are normally pretty independant. The dogs like to play but we see them as toys unless we are to busy for them. Kids are just a pain in the $%# no matter how you look at it. LOL

-- ~ Inspiring those who inspire me ~

View John in SD's profile

John in SD

140 posts in 4049 days

#14 posted 03-29-2009 08:29 AM

Hey Charlie M….
Are those collars with flashing lights and beeping back up signals for the people or for the kittys and puppies ?

-- Life used to be soooo much simpler!!!!

View TopamaxSurvivor's profile


18423 posts in 3912 days

#15 posted 03-30-2009 03:07 AM

The gov’t should require a full body harness attached to a sky hook before they register and license any kitties or puppies. Anyone caught without the proper equipment, license and registration will have thier puppy and kitty rights serioulsy curtailed for 5 years. Of course and 2nd violation will not be tolerated, period!

-- Bob in WW ~ "some old things are lovely, warm still with life ... of the forgotten men who made them." - D.H. Lawrence

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