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Simple Home Remedies............

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Forum topic by juniorjock posted 02-27-2009 02:21 AM 794 views 0 times favorited 7 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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juniorjock

1930 posts in 3226 days


02-27-2009 02:21 AM

Topic tags/keywords: humor

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your
veins. Remember to use a timer.

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you
hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you’ll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life – WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn’t move and should, use the WD -40. If it shouldn’t
move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you can’t fix it with a hammer, you’ve got an electrical problem.

Daily Thought:

SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES; NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE
STAIRS


7 replies so far

View cabinetmaster's profile

cabinetmaster

10874 posts in 3018 days


#1 posted 02-27-2009 02:54 AM

Thanks for the laugh Junior. Some great humor there.

-- Jerry--A man can never have enough tools or clamps

View kiwi1969's profile

kiwi1969

609 posts in 2902 days


#2 posted 02-27-2009 03:00 AM

Nice to have a laugh over my morning coffee, thanks mate

-- if the hand is not working it is not a pure hand

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mtnwild

3474 posts in 2988 days


#3 posted 02-27-2009 03:26 AM

Love the hammer one. Thanks . Can’t think of one off hand, will get back with ya.

-- mtnwild (Jack), It's not what you see, it's how you see it.

View lew's profile

lew

11335 posts in 3216 days


#4 posted 02-27-2009 03:40 AM

Tomorrows thought:

Elevators smell different to midgets.

-- Lew- Time traveler. Purveyor of the Universe's finest custom rolling pins.

View Bureaucrat's profile

Bureaucrat

18337 posts in 3112 days


#5 posted 02-27-2009 04:28 AM

I like the slinky one. I have heard of people who have a slinky for a spine but this one a tear of joy to my eye.

-- Gary D. Stoughton, WI

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jm540

150 posts in 2879 days


#6 posted 02-27-2009 04:44 AM

that is absoluty perfect

-- jay Rambling on and on again

View Hersh328's profile

Hersh328

38 posts in 2884 days


#7 posted 02-27-2009 04:59 AM

That’s why I’m not an electrician…

-- Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum viditur

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