|Forum topic by longgone||posted 05-10-2014 09:31 PM||1135 views||1 time favorited||10 replies|
05-10-2014 09:31 PM
Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
Spades – King David
Hearts – Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds – Julius Caesar
If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died because of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the ground,the person died of natural causes
Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn’t added until 5 years later.
A. Their birthplace
What is the most popular boat name requested?
A. One thousand
A. All were invented by women.
A. Father’s Day
In Shakespeare’s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase… ‘Goodnight , sleep tight’
Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
So in old England , when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them ‘Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.’
It’s where we get the phrase ‘mind your P’s and Q’s’
When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. ‘Wet your whistle’ is the phrase inspired by this practice.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2014 when…
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and
family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to
See if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries…
7. Every commercial on television has a Web site at the bottom
of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t
even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life,
is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it!
10. You get up in the morning and go on-line before getting
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)
12. You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going
to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there
wasn’t a #9 on this list ..
~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
NOW you’re LAUGHING at yourself!
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves,
for they shall never cease to be amused!” (Unknown Author)