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Forum topic by a1Jim posted 12-19-2013 12:14 AM 817 views 0 times favorited 39 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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a1Jim

112030 posts in 2215 days


12-19-2013 12:14 AM

Topic tags/keywords: humor

Just a little bit about Oregon

“According to Jeff Foxworthy:

If you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle’s Best, and Dutch Bros, you live in Oregon. · If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t work there, you live in Oregon. · If you’ve worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time, you live in Oregon. · If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number, you live in Oregon. · If you measure distance in hours, you live in Oregon. · If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Oregon. · If your car has been hit by a deer (not the other way around), you live in Southern Oregon. · If you have switched from ‘heat’ to ‘A/C’ and back again in the same day, you live in Oregon. · If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both doors unlocked, you live in Oregon. · If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Central, Southern or Eastern Oregon. · If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a 2 layers of clothes or under a raincoat, you live in Oregon. · If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow and ice, you live in Oregon. · If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you live in Oregon. · If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee, you live in Oregon. · If you know more people who own boats than air conditioners, you live in Oregon. · If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the “Walk” signal, you live in Oregon. · If you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain, you live in Oregon. · If you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon, you live in Oregon. · If you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Clatskanie, Issaquah, Oregon, Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette, you live in Oregon. · If you know that Boring is a city and not just a feeling, you live in Oregon. · If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food, you live in Oregon. · If you never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho, you live in Oregon. · If you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain, you live in Oregon. · If you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists, you live in Oregon. · If you know who grew, picked and roasted your free-trade coffee or who raised your local, organic free-range chicken, you live in Oregon. · If you buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old ones after such a long time, you live in Oregon. · If you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your OREGON friends, you live or have lived in Oregon.”

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture


39 replies so far

View muleskinner's profile

muleskinner

668 posts in 1074 days


#1 posted 12-19-2013 12:22 AM

Yep.

(and you can pretty much interchange Oregon and Washington. )

-- Visualize whirled peas

View a1Jim's profile

a1Jim

112030 posts in 2215 days


#2 posted 12-19-2013 12:25 AM

You have that right Muleskinner.

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

View NormG's profile

NormG

4116 posts in 1641 days


#3 posted 12-19-2013 12:25 AM

Klamath Falls when I was kid whiule my father work on a large construction project

-- Norman

View pintodeluxe's profile

pintodeluxe

3337 posts in 1451 days


#4 posted 12-19-2013 12:27 AM

I am just imagining someone from another part of the country pronouncing it Orey-Gone a hundred times.
Funny stuff.

-- Willie, Washington "If You Choose Not To Decide, You Still Have Made a Choice" - Rush

View 7Footer's profile

7Footer

1014 posts in 586 days


#5 posted 12-19-2013 12:31 AM

Spot on Jim! Lol.

Almost perfect across the board, the only one I can say no to is the free-range chicken thing! And the deer jumping into your car works not only in Southern Oregon!

+1 for the umbrella line.

-- If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did." -

View a1Jim's profile

a1Jim

112030 posts in 2215 days


#6 posted 12-19-2013 12:33 AM

Yep that’s what they do on the national news, They say or E gone or like Wille has it spelled out.

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

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a1Jim

112030 posts in 2215 days


#7 posted 12-19-2013 12:34 AM

That’s because you don’t live far enough south 7Footer :))

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

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7Footer

1014 posts in 586 days


#8 posted 12-19-2013 12:41 AM

No lol I’m saying its happened and I live in Northern Oregon, growing up in Yamhill when I was 15 and had a permit, my Dad would let me drive to school and then take the truck from there and we lived on a gravel road, and about 1/4 mile from our house a deer jumped right into the side of our truck, scared the hell out of us (and put a huge dent in the quarter panel)! It’s stumbled around for a few seconds then gathered itself and hopped back into the forest!

-- If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did." -

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a1Jim

112030 posts in 2215 days


#9 posted 12-19-2013 12:47 AM

Crazy old deer ,I guess it was mad at you for being right in the way of it’s normal pathe it followed.

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

View b2rtch's profile

b2rtch

4318 posts in 1686 days


#10 posted 12-19-2013 12:49 AM

I loved Oregon, I wish could go back

-- Bert

View Craftsman on the lake's profile

Craftsman on the lake

2383 posts in 2075 days


#11 posted 12-19-2013 12:55 AM

Lots of the same stuff her in Maine.. Traveled the Oregon coast a couple of years ago… I’ll always remember it.

-- The smell of wood, coffee in the cup, the wife let's me do my thing, the lake is peaceful.

View muleskinner's profile

muleskinner

668 posts in 1074 days


#12 posted 12-19-2013 01:00 AM

I don’t understand the problem with the place names. To me they’re pronounced just like they’re spelled. (well Sequim is pronounced skwim, but we don’t hold it against most people when they screw it up)

-- Visualize whirled peas

View DocSavage45's profile

DocSavage45

4930 posts in 1480 days


#13 posted 12-19-2013 01:02 AM

A friend told me Oregon was a lot like Arkansas, but you need a boat to get anywhere. LOL! Lucky you!

-- Cau Haus Designs, Thomas J. Tieffenbacher

View JustplaneJeff's profile

JustplaneJeff

172 posts in 541 days


#14 posted 12-19-2013 01:11 AM

Was born in Oregon and lived there till I was 16. Lived in the valley between the Cascades and the Costal Range, 25 miles west of Portland. I sure miss the mountains, Landmarks you could use. Here in Ohio every corn and bean field look pretty much the same. Don’t miss the rainy weather though, although it did make for some great fruit and vegetable gardens. Related to a lot of Jims post Thanks for the memories>

-- JustplaneJeff

View Hinge's profile

Hinge

52 posts in 326 days


#15 posted 12-19-2013 01:46 AM

If you don’t have air conditioning in your home and no one else in town does either then you live in an Oregon coastal town.

-- The Lord is my Savior, the wife is my boss.

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