|Forum topic by NBeener||posted 10-25-2012 04:22 PM||2870 views||0 times favorited||55 replies|
10-25-2012 04:22 PM
Hi, LumberJocks !!!
It’s been a while. I know.
I was hoping to update you all, and let you know that I’m settled … things are good … I’m setting up my new shop … and un-crating my SawStop.
Sadly, I can’t say that. Well … I COULD, but …. ;-)
The bulk of the legal stuff is behind me. I was convinced to take a plea agreement, largely because neither my wallet nor my health could likely have endured a trial, and … the penalty for failure … may have been prison.
For never having done anything wrong, or having broken any laws.
The amazing bionic lenses … that allowed me to live a more full life ….
I can’t wear, now. It’s been months and months. The eye doctors have thrown everything they can at reducing the inflammation in my eyes, but … no response.
Another issue has cropped up—called “conjunctivochalasis.” Essentially, the lower covering of my eyeballs … has bunched up like a pair of socks that have lost their elasticity. That COULD be ONE of the problems with the wear of my lenses.
There’s a surgery for that, but … along with its inherent risks … nobody can say that it will solve the problems, and … it automatically means another six-week, $12,000, painful trip to Boston, to try to make new lenses that WILL fit—something that just isn’t in me, now.
So … my armor is gone. The shields are down, Captain Kirk :-)
Picture waking up in a northern Minnesota winter’s day, naked. No way to find or make clothing. The world is a harsh and physically dangerous place, and … you’re not in any position to deal with it.
And … no lenses … means no woodworking. No way around that—at least, for now.
They’re telling me that … this Colorado climate (altitude and dryness) won’t work for me.
Air conditioned and heated environments … won’t work for me.
My current plan … is a huge Hail Mary pass. My retired cousin and I are thinking of heading down to Central America, in the early spring.
Maybe spend six months … in warm, tropical climates. Skip the a/c. Explore that part of the world. Maybe meet some woodworkers … recup some of the serious financial losses … and … de-stress.
My wife and I … separated, now, by 80 miles … don’t really talk about us, or the future. We’ll just see which way the winds take me/us.
The Court ordered a psychological evaluation. Once the psychologist verified, with my attorney, that everything I said was true, he was horrified. He also agreed that I’m now suffering from Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder … and … insomnia.
But it isn’t in me to chase down help for THAT, right now. I’m hoping that a TOTAL change of scenery … helps.
I still get FWW and “WOOD,” at my ratty little hotel, and … still think about projects, my shop, and y’all … a lot. A couple of days, I’ve helped my brother with things like building a shed. Kept my hands in the wood, at least a little.
My health has been pretty unsteady. I’m currently on steroids and a month of pretty serious antibiotics for skin and sinus infections—infections that pretty much haven’t released their grip, since all of this started.
I’ve learned something that … I already knew: the human spirit is amazingly strong, and amazingly resillient. When we tell ourselves that we CAN “stand it,” or CAN “take more,” ... I’m finding that … somehow … I can.
And, for now, that’s going to have to be enough.
Just know that I miss you all. I miss my craft. I miss the camraderie of my fellow LumberJocks.
Heck … I miss a LOT of things LOL !
I’ll try to pop in … at least once in a while. Promise.
All my best….
-- -- Neil