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Forum topic by a1Jim posted 04-01-2012 06:16 PM 1718 views 0 times favorited 36 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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a1Jim

112858 posts in 2323 days


04-01-2012 06:16 PM

Topic tags/keywords: humor

I know no one want’s to be labeled as someone who lies but I’m afraid that LJs has their share of people who tell tall,tall stories . Given this is the 1st of April it’s(April fools day) the day that all is forgiven when we tell big fat lies all in humor. I originally thought I would post a big tall story saying I won the lottery or something like my wife getting a miniature horse and having it set on the couch with her and ride around in the front seat of the car with her. I found a couple faults with those stories one the IRS would be looking for their share of the lottery(I don’t have) number 2, having my wife throw things at me for the next month or so, the latter being the scariest . So I thought it would be fun to ask all of you to give us your best tall story or Apirl’s fools jokes That you have been involved in or just want to make up.

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture


36 replies so far

View Roger Clark aka Rex's profile

Roger Clark aka Rex

6940 posts in 2181 days


#1 posted 04-01-2012 06:21 PM

Wow Jim, you have really opened the door.

-- Roger-R, Republic of Texas. "Always look on the Bright Side of Life" - An eyeball to eyeball confrontation with a blind person is as complete waste of Time.

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a1Jim

112858 posts in 2323 days


#2 posted 04-01-2012 06:24 PM

You betch ya Roger .
I’m sure you can give is some input:)) Not that your a story teller or anything like that .

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

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Roger Clark aka Rex

6940 posts in 2181 days


#3 posted 04-01-2012 06:41 PM

Four of us from the IS/IT department went up to Dallas to attend a computer conference and show. We took one of the company’s 8 seat vans, and our company being in the insurance business always had top of the line loaded vehicles. All went well on the outbound journey, but on the way back, I was driving and a real tech nerd was in the passenger seat with 2 other guys in the seat behind us.
The van had radio controls front and rear (also ac too) and on the way back I turned the radio on. Well, I told the nerd that the van had one of those new type audio systems that would automatically change stations by clapping your hands or making a noise of some sort. He did not believe me, so I told him to clap his hands, and to his sheer amazement the radio changed stations, he clapped again, it changed stations again. I tapped on the dash, the station changed, I blew the horn, the station changed. He was absolutely dumbfounded and praised the technology. Little did he know my buddy in the seat behind also has access to the other audio system controls and was changing the station on cue.
We did this all the way back, we were holding back laughing and almost peed ourselves, and the best part was when this guy got back to the office, he tried to tell others in the department of this new audio system.
Gotcha.

-- Roger-R, Republic of Texas. "Always look on the Bright Side of Life" - An eyeball to eyeball confrontation with a blind person is as complete waste of Time.

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vipond33

1405 posts in 1244 days


#4 posted 04-01-2012 06:44 PM

Funny you should post this Jim, for last year on this day I took the name that I used here http://lumberjocks.com/projects/63969 and said to my boss that Loof Lirpa (a supposed local Swedish cabinetmaker) had offered me a job for $10k a year more than I was getting from him. He looked at me long and hard for a good minute and then smiled and said “Go for it Gene, but you’ll be back tomorrow I think.”

-- gene@toronto.ontario.canada : dovetail free since '53, critiques always welcome.

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a1Jim

112858 posts in 2323 days


#5 posted 04-01-2012 06:45 PM

HA HA HA That’s great Rog

Very creative Gene if he said I’ll match that you win if not it’s just a April fools joke. you sly devil you :))

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

View Roger Clark aka Rex's profile

Roger Clark aka Rex

6940 posts in 2181 days


#6 posted 04-01-2012 07:00 PM

One more true story before I go to the shop.
Where I worked was a multistory building with a basement that housed shipping and the company cafeteria. At break times, everyone crowded into the elevators heading for the basement and after heading for the elevator again to get to their work floor.
Well, as some of you know, I have a remote Fart machine – the same one I still have fun with at hospitals. Well, I duck taped the receiver behind the elevator inside hand rail, waited for the elevator to fill up, doors closed elevator started and I started to press the controller every few seconds. I wish I had installed a camera in that elevator to see the reactions, the eyes looking around and bodies changing positions. I was told everyone thought it was real and talked about people who got out at lower floors thinking those were the culprits until there were more farts, so the staring eyes viewed less suspects.

-- Roger-R, Republic of Texas. "Always look on the Bright Side of Life" - An eyeball to eyeball confrontation with a blind person is as complete waste of Time.

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Roger Clark aka Rex

6940 posts in 2181 days


#7 posted 04-01-2012 07:04 PM

Oh BTW, my latest “toy”

The Official Bullsh*t Button (BS Button)
by Gemmy

-- Roger-R, Republic of Texas. "Always look on the Bright Side of Life" - An eyeball to eyeball confrontation with a blind person is as complete waste of Time.

View stefang's profile

stefang

13632 posts in 2081 days


#8 posted 04-01-2012 07:22 PM

The last April fools joke I tried was on April 1, 1966 when I asked my wife to marry me. It’s 46 years later and she still hasn’t got it yet.

And after hearing this, she is now mad at me too. That’s why’ I don’t tell many jokes!

-- Mike, an American living in Norway.

View Joe Lyddon's profile

Joe Lyddon

7934 posts in 2799 days


#9 posted 04-01-2012 07:26 PM

Roger…

You are a RIOT!

Thank you!

I still have to get one of those fart machines!
... sounds like a lot of FUN!

You forgot to mention the time in the waiting room for a Dr. appointment… !! LOL

-- Have Fun! Joe Lyddon - Alta Loma, CA USA - Home: http://www.WoodworkStuff.net ... My Small Gallery: http://www.ncwoodworker.net/pp/showgallery.php?ppuser=1389&cat=500"

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a1Jim

112858 posts in 2323 days


#10 posted 04-01-2012 07:36 PM

your wild and crazy guy roger,I wish you had film of that too.
Mike I’m sure after all those years neither one of you could do with out the other.
Joe I bet a big pot of beans is cheaper than one of those machines.:))

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

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Joe Lyddon

7934 posts in 2799 days


#11 posted 04-01-2012 07:54 PM

Jim,

Well might be close… I guess it boils down to How Big the Pot is… LOL
Here is a Fart Machine very close to the same that Roger is using.

(we’ve talked about this before… LOL)

-- Have Fun! Joe Lyddon - Alta Loma, CA USA - Home: http://www.WoodworkStuff.net ... My Small Gallery: http://www.ncwoodworker.net/pp/showgallery.php?ppuser=1389&cat=500"

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Karson

34912 posts in 3147 days


#12 posted 04-01-2012 08:09 PM

David Letterman on tv friday night. Told everyone that Sunday was April 1. So be sure and turn you clocks back.

-- I've been blessed with a father who liked to tinker in wood, and a wife who lets me tinker in wood. Southern Delaware karson_morrison@bigfoot.com †

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hairy

2108 posts in 2279 days


#13 posted 04-01-2012 08:30 PM

Super glue a penny to the floor. It works every time.

-- in the confusion, I mighta grabbed the gold ...

View Rex Johnson's profile

Rex Johnson

6 posts in 1582 days


#14 posted 04-01-2012 08:46 PM

Glue a half dollar (so old people can see it..lol) to the floor. It sure does work all the time.

View Joe Lyddon's profile

Joe Lyddon

7934 posts in 2799 days


#15 posted 04-01-2012 08:51 PM

naahhh… I only bend over for Silver Dollars! LOL

... anything less, I let others have… LOL

-- Have Fun! Joe Lyddon - Alta Loma, CA USA - Home: http://www.WoodworkStuff.net ... My Small Gallery: http://www.ncwoodworker.net/pp/showgallery.php?ppuser=1389&cat=500"

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