LumberJocks

Things You Learn Living In The South

  • Advertise with us

« back to Coffee Lounge forum

Forum topic by juniorjock posted 757 days ago 1614 views 0 times favorited 43 replies Add to Favorites Watch
View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2268 days


757 days ago

Topic tags/keywords: southern humor

Thought some of you might get a laugh out of this. But, don’t laugh too much, cause most of these are true…..

THINGS YOU LEARN LIVING IN THE SOUTH

A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.

There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one’s seen before.

If it growls, it’ll stick ya. If it crawls, it’ll bite cha.

Onced and Twiced are words.

It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

Jawl-P? Means, Did you all go to the bathroom?

People actually grow,eat and like okra.

Fixinto is one word. It means I’m going to do that.

There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there’s supper.

Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you’re two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.

Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.

The word jeet is actually a question meaning, ‘Did you eat?’

You don’t have to wear a watch, because it doesn’t matter what time it is, you work until you’re done or it’s too dark to see.

You don’t PUSH buttons, you MASH em.

Ya’ll is singular. All ya’ll is plural.

All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.

You carry jumper cables in your car – for your OWN car.

You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, Tabasco and ketchup.

The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, the motor sports, and gossip.

Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss(first name) or Mr.(first name)

You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

You know what a hissy fit is..

Fried catfish is the other white meat.

We don’t need no dang Driver’s Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!


43 replies so far

View Rick  Dennington's profile

Rick Dennington

3253 posts in 1697 days


#1 posted 757 days ago

JJ:

I was born and raised in the South, and have lived here all my life….I’ve heard just about every one of those sayings at one time or another….From my grandma, grandpa, mom, or pop….that’s where I learned the English language….proper-like…..nothin’ like kinfolk to show you the ropes…..lol. They are still oldies, but goodies…..

-- " I started with nothing, and I've still got most of it left".......

View Karson's profile

Karson

34797 posts in 2903 days


#2 posted 757 days ago

I must be south by osmosis. They all ring true. Thanks Ya’ll

-- I've been blessed with a father who liked to tinker in wood, and a wife who lets me tinker in wood. Southern Delaware karson_morrison@bigfoot.com †

View RandyM68's profile

RandyM68

693 posts in 821 days


#3 posted 757 days ago

I resemble that.

-- I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you. I'm sorry,thanks.

View degoose's profile

degoose

6883 posts in 1858 days


#4 posted 757 days ago

Australian..a few similar types of questions.

Emma Chizet…. how much is it?

Can’t cheer me…. can’t you hear me?

-- Drink twice... and don't bother to cut... @ lazylarrywoodworks.com.au For lovers of all things timber...

View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2268 days


#5 posted 757 days ago

Rick, I bet if we tried we could come up with hundreds more.

degoose, come on now, I know you have more. We’d like to here them. Actually, I’d say that every part of the world has their own little way of saying things. But, I bet the south in the USA may be the hardest for others to understand.

View fussy's profile

fussy

979 posts in 1554 days


#6 posted 757 days ago

JJ,

Here’s living (formerly) proof of #1.

Steve

-- Steve in KY. 44 years so far with my lovely bride. Think I'll keep her.

View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2268 days


#7 posted 757 days ago

Dayyyumnn. Good one Steve.

View fussy's profile

fussy

979 posts in 1554 days


#8 posted 757 days ago

JJ,

This is what you use if your wife has the 4-wheeler.

Steve

-- Steve in KY. 44 years so far with my lovely bride. Think I'll keep her.

View gfadvm's profile

gfadvm

9568 posts in 1193 days


#9 posted 757 days ago

That probably explains why I need an interpreter when I do a speaking gig in the North!

-- " I'll try to be nicer, if you'll try to be smarter" gfadvm

View mtenterprises's profile

mtenterprises

784 posts in 1196 days


#10 posted 757 days ago

Ayup!
MIKE

-- See pictures on Flickr - http://www.flickr.com/photos/44216106@N07/ And visit my Facebook page - facebook.com/MTEnterprises

View CharlesNeil's profile

CharlesNeil

1098 posts in 2374 days


#11 posted 757 days ago

well it’s no secret which language I speak, sheeeeeeeee it, It’s the language given to those who were so graciously blessed to be born in the South, but we do try hard to Like the rest of y’all , :)

View Rick  Dennington's profile

Rick Dennington

3253 posts in 1697 days


#12 posted 757 days ago

JJ:
I was raised on red beans, taters, and cornbread, with a big raw oinion….and sweet tea…..down here in the South they are called “vittles”....Mama always put a little “fatback” in the beans, or a big hamhock….When you’re done with the vittles, it’s time for a big slice of chocolate cake…..with buttermilk…

Down here we run “tars” on our cars and trucks…..when I was little used to get a “whooping” with a razor strap…...and you check the “awl” in your truck to see if it is low….

-- " I started with nothing, and I've still got most of it left".......

View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2268 days


#13 posted 756 days ago

It was about the same here, Rick. Red beans, green beans, soup beans….. every kind of bean you could think of. No one said anything if there wasn’t any meat on the table. There was plenty of other good stuff. I think my grandmaw cooked for the entire neighborhood. We never knew who was going to be there. I think you came out better on the whoopin’s. My dad used his belt. None of his belts were over 1/2” to 3/4” wide. I would have stripes all over the back of my legs. My Mom used her hand up until the time she hurt herself while whoppin’ me. After that…. I had to go out in the yard and cut a switch out of a tree and take it to her. I’ll say this though, I never got a whoopin’ that I didn’t deserve.

View gfadvm's profile

gfadvm

9568 posts in 1193 days


#14 posted 756 days ago

Rick, You’re making me hungry and I just ate! There is nothing better than crawfish and gumbo with some red beans and rice on the side.

-- " I'll try to be nicer, if you'll try to be smarter" gfadvm

View Rick  Dennington's profile

Rick Dennington

3253 posts in 1697 days


#15 posted 756 days ago

gfadvm:

I really like hot, spicy boiled crawfish, peel-em-and eat-em shrimp, and gumbo (shrimp) with the little taters, little ears of corn, and more spice…The best place to get that grub is in Louisana…the red beans and rice ain’t bad, either….lol. But you just can’t beat good home cooking…like mine, most grandmas and mommas were the best cooks…...Sure wish I had a big ole bowl of cornbread a cabbage with a bowl of etouffee….

-- " I started with nothing, and I've still got most of it left".......

showing 1 through 15 of 43 replies

Have your say...

You must be signed in to reply.

DISCLAIMER: Any posts on LJ are posted by individuals acting in their own right and do not necessarily reflect the views of LJ. LJ will not be held liable for the actions of any user.

Latest Projects | Latest Blog Entries | Latest Forum Topics

HomeRefurbers.com

Latest Projects | Latest Blog Entries | Latest Forum Topics

GardenTenders.com :: gardening showcase