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I heard ROY UNDERHILL and CHRIS SCHWARZ were ARRESTED!!!

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Forum topic by StumpyNubs posted 1050 days ago 8859 views 1 time favorited 43 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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StumpyNubs

6172 posts in 1432 days


1050 days ago

Topic tags/keywords: humor

Did you hear the news? Turns out there was this HUGE fight at Woodworking in America and Roy Underhill took out his anger on Chris Schwarz with a big hunk of Iron!

The way I heard it, Roy was whittling a little wooden boat out of a larger wooden boat and Chris came up behind him. Words were exchanged about hand tool skills. Chris took hold of Roy’s mustache and cut half of it off with a paring chisel. Flushed with anger, Roy pulled a carving mallet from under his hat and threatened to mess up Chris’ hair. That’s when it all hit the fan!

Schwarz grabbed Undrehill by the suspenders and began swinging him around in circles while Underhill flailed his arms, shouting some kind of backwoods profanity until he tripped over a bench dog and landed on the convention center floor. When he came to his feet he was wielding an iron bench hook with murder in his eyes. A couple of swings was all it took to knock Chris Schwarz silly, but Roy wasn’t done. Before storming off he let out a manly roar as he tore his shirt from his chest, his sinewy muscles bulging from years of cutting down trees with a dull axe. Then he lifted all 300 pounds of Schwarz’s bench over his head and threw it into the crowd!

The end result was a severely cut knuckle on Chris’s left hand and a broken bench.

At least that’s how I heard it. Of course, Schwarz tells the story differently on his blog. But you’d expect that…

-- It's the best woodworking show since the invention of wood... New episodes at: http://www.stumpynubs.com


43 replies so far

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Brandon

4138 posts in 1583 days


#1 posted 1050 days ago

Yup, I’m pretty sure you have the correct details on that one.

-- "hold fast to that which is good"

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TopamaxSurvivor

14724 posts in 2307 days


#2 posted 1050 days ago

I heard it a little different. He tripped over the yeller dawg that follows him into the shop everyday.

-- "some old things are lovely, warm still with life ... of the forgotten men who made them." - D.H. Lawrence

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redryder

2139 posts in 1733 days


#3 posted 1050 days ago

Wait a minute, is that true????

-- mike...............

View HorizontalMike's profile

HorizontalMike

6925 posts in 1545 days


#4 posted 1050 days ago

Whew! And I thought I heard:

…The end result was a severely cut TV Episode...

;-)

-- HorizontalMike -- "Woodpeckers understand..."

View CharlieM1958's profile

CharlieM1958

15688 posts in 2850 days


#5 posted 1050 days ago

Wait a minute, is that true????

Would Stumpy say anything that wasn’t true??!!

-- Charlie M. "Woodworking - patience = firewood"

View A Slice of Wood Workshop's profile

A Slice of Wood Workshop

890 posts in 1805 days


#6 posted 1050 days ago

Must be a hard life out there at WIA11. Here's the full story, pay special attention to the cracking over the head part. thanks to Stumpy for getting us the story.

-- Tim- http://www.asliceofwoodworkshop.com; Twitter-@asliceofwood; Facebook-http://www.facebook.com/asliceofwood

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StumpyNubs

6172 posts in 1432 days


#7 posted 1050 days ago

Is it true? Photos don’t lie…

Head Chuck- You honestly believe that rediculas story Chris told on his blog? Like THAT’S plausable…

-- It's the best woodworking show since the invention of wood... New episodes at: http://www.stumpynubs.com

View HorizontalMike's profile

HorizontalMike

6925 posts in 1545 days


#8 posted 1050 days ago

Dang! They BOTH have the SAME Inmate number! I knew it, they are Siamese Twins!

-- HorizontalMike -- "Woodpeckers understand..."

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GMman

3902 posts in 2329 days


#9 posted 1050 days ago

1st thing I noticed just like Mike SAME Inmate number

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StumpyNubs

6172 posts in 1432 days


#10 posted 1050 days ago

GMan & Mike- Are you saying those photos may be fake? Are you saying I may have gotten my information from an unreliable source?

Besides- you’re mistaken. Look again…

-- It's the best woodworking show since the invention of wood... New episodes at: http://www.stumpynubs.com

View mikema's profile

mikema

175 posts in 1217 days


#11 posted 1050 days ago

Wow! I didn’t realize that WIA so popular with the Little Rock police that they were stationed all the way up in Covington, KY! :)

-- Mike ---- Visit my woodworking blog: http://sawdustnewbie.com

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StumpyNubs

6172 posts in 1432 days


#12 posted 1050 days ago

Mikema- My sources tell me that they had to be taken out of state to a more secure location to avoid the paparazzi, you know… because of their big celebrity status. Since nobody cares what happens in Arkansas, it was a good place to book them.

-- It's the best woodworking show since the invention of wood... New episodes at: http://www.stumpynubs.com

View HorizontalMike's profile

HorizontalMike

6925 posts in 1545 days


#13 posted 1050 days ago

Stumpy,
So when did the operation take place to separate these conjoined twins? And was it at the local county Hospital? Guess they got tired of sharing a cell?

;-)

-- HorizontalMike -- "Woodpeckers understand..."

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mikema

175 posts in 1217 days


#14 posted 1050 days ago

StumpyNubs- Okay, that explains it then! I shudder to think how much worse that already bad situation would have been with the paparazzi, and hand-tool mob for that matter, had they not taken those added steps for security.

HorizontalMike- I have been wondering that myself. I was thinking more along the lines of woodshop for the operating room, a 100 year old workbench as the operating table, and a large, 100 year old, two person saw for the actual separation..

-- Mike ---- Visit my woodworking blog: http://sawdustnewbie.com

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HorizontalMike

6925 posts in 1545 days


#15 posted 1050 days ago

Doctor mikema!

-- HorizontalMike -- "Woodpeckers understand..."

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