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Forum topic by longgone posted 09-08-2011 12:05 AM 4295 views 0 times favorited 15 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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longgone

5688 posts in 2674 days


09-08-2011 12:05 AM

KEEP THE GRAY MATTER ACTIVE

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

5. What word in the English Language is always spelled incorrectly?

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet his birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

8. What was the President’s Name in 1975?

9. If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

10. Which is correct to say, “The yolk of the egg are white” or “The yolk of the egg is white”?

11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

Here are the Answers

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

Answer: Johnny of course

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

Answer: Meat.

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

Answer: Mt. Everest; it just wasn’t discovered yet.
4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

Answer: There is no dirt in a hole.

5. What word in the English Language is always spelled incorrectly?

Answer: Incorrectly

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet her birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

Answer: Billy lives in the Southern Hemisphere

7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

Answer: You can’t take pictures with a wooden leg. You need a camera to take pictures.

8. What was the President’s Name in 1975?

Answer: Same as is it now – Barack Obama [Oh, come on …]

9. If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

Answer: You would be in 2nd. Well, you passed the person in second place, not first.

10. Which is correct to say, “The yolk of the egg are white” or “The yolk of the egg is white”?

Answer: Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow [Duh]

11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

Answer: One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.


15 replies so far

View rance's profile

rance

4242 posts in 2526 days


#1 posted 09-08-2011 12:23 AM

You are funny, but looks aren’t everything. :)

I only missed #9.

-- Backer boards, stop blocks, build oversized, and never buy a hand plane--

View Mark's profile

Mark

1801 posts in 2639 days


#2 posted 09-08-2011 01:10 AM

Hahaha thats great…I’m an idiot…got more?

-- M.K.

View Murdock's profile

Murdock

118 posts in 1849 days


#3 posted 09-08-2011 04:40 AM

I really like this sort of thing, hoping someone has some more.

-- "Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." - Albert Einstein

View gfadvm's profile

gfadvm

14890 posts in 2055 days


#4 posted 09-08-2011 04:49 AM

Nice Greg – I only missed the wooden leg one.

-- " I'll try to be nicer, if you'll try to be smarter" gfadvm

View BobTheFish's profile

BobTheFish

361 posts in 1917 days


#5 posted 09-08-2011 06:45 AM

here’s another:

I was hunting one day and I traveled 5 miles south when I came across a giant bear. It scared the bejeesus out of me and I ran five miles east to escape it. Tired and hungry, and after nearly dying, I caught my breath and travelled 5 miles north to return home. What color was the bear?

View Bluepine38's profile

Bluepine38

3319 posts in 2451 days


#6 posted 09-08-2011 06:53 AM

Bob, it would have to be a white polar bear, only at the north pole would those measurements work.

-- As ever, Gus-the 77 yr young apprentice carpenter

View tomd's profile

tomd

2008 posts in 3136 days


#7 posted 09-08-2011 06:58 AM

I enjoyed them, but I think I’m out of gray matter.

-- Tom D

View TopamaxSurvivor's profile

TopamaxSurvivor

17487 posts in 3041 days


#8 posted 09-08-2011 07:05 AM

I’m proud of myself, only 2 missed ;-)) Topamax is wearing off!! I might get them all in another 7 years.

-- Bob in WW ~ "some old things are lovely, warm still with life ... of the forgotten men who made them." - D.H. Lawrence

View BobTheFish's profile

BobTheFish

361 posts in 1917 days


#9 posted 09-08-2011 07:33 AM

nice one blue.. :)

View Roger's profile

Roger

19453 posts in 2169 days


#10 posted 09-08-2011 03:04 PM

i got every one of em wrong…. lol

-- Roger from KY. Work/Play/Travel Safe. Keep your dust collector fed. Kentuk55@yahoo.com

View CharlieM1958's profile

CharlieM1958

16225 posts in 3584 days


#11 posted 09-08-2011 03:31 PM

Am I the first one to get them all right?

Greg, this test must be slanted in favor of coonasses.

-- Charlie M. "Woodworking - patience = firewood"

View longgone's profile

longgone

5688 posts in 2674 days


#12 posted 09-08-2011 04:02 PM

Charlie M, It must be because I got all right on the first try also.

View rrdesigns's profile

rrdesigns

524 posts in 2551 days


#13 posted 09-10-2011 04:42 AM

There is hope for me yet. Had to think a little, then laugh a little, but thankfully, came out with 100% right. I especially enjoyed the one about the yolk. Thanks for sharing.

-- Beth, Oklahoma, Rambling Road Designs

View MrWoodworker's profile

MrWoodworker

65 posts in 1960 days


#14 posted 09-10-2011 05:10 AM

Got me on the #2 racer, I knew it was too easy but didn’t catch it.

-- http://nationalwoodworking.com

View DamnYankee's profile

DamnYankee

3297 posts in 1927 days


#15 posted 09-10-2011 05:48 AM

Got me on #2 as well, guess I’m getting dull in my no so young age.

-- Shameless - Winner of two Stumpy Nubs Awards

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