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Forum topic by Gene Howe posted 10-16-2010 05:49 PM 1170 views 0 times favorited 8 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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Gene Howe

11064 posts in 3629 days

10-16-2010 05:49 PM

Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe….as it happens, near Transylvania . They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late and raining very hard. Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly, the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail! The car swerves and smashes into a tree.

Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to get her medical assistance.
Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming from a large, old house. He approaches the door and knocks.
A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, “Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife Betty. We’ve been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?”

“I’m sorry,” replied the hunchback, “but we don’t have a phone. My master is a doctor; come in, and I will get him!”
Bob brings his wife in.

An older man comes down the stairs. “I’m afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor; I am a scientist.. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had a basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory.”

With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely.. Igor places Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries, so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table.

After a brief examination, Igor’s master looks worried. “Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion.” Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty Hill are no more.

The Hills’ deaths upset Igor’s master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his grand piano. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house.

Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. His eyes catch movement, and he notices the fingers on Betty’s hand twitch, keeping time to the haunting piano music. Stunned, he watches as Bob’s arm begins to rise, marking the beat! He is further amazed as Betty and Bob both sit up straight!

Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory.

He bursts in and shouts to his master:

“Master, Master!.....
The Hills are alive with the sound of music!”

(I am soooooo sorry…..but you really should’ve seen that one coming!!)

-- Gene 'The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.' G. K. Chesterton

8 replies so far

View sras's profile


4943 posts in 3330 days

#1 posted 10-16-2010 06:02 PM

groan …

-- Steve - Impatience is Expensive

View CharlieM1958's profile


16281 posts in 4419 days

#2 posted 10-16-2010 07:01 PM

A loooooong way to go for the punch line! :-)

-- Charlie M. "Woodworking - patience = firewood"

View Dez's profile


1166 posts in 4278 days

#3 posted 10-16-2010 07:06 PM

That one reminds me of the ones my father always liked to tell. He called them “shaggy dog” stories. a long involved story with a play on words pun as the ending. Thanks for the mammories! LOL

-- Folly ever comes cloaked in opportunity!

View Howie's profile


2656 posts in 3123 days

#4 posted 10-17-2010 01:18 AM

Been hanging around the glue pot too long Gene?

-- Life is good.

View Gene Howe's profile

Gene Howe

11064 posts in 3629 days

#5 posted 10-17-2010 02:40 AM

Didn’t know it had glue in it, Howie.

-- Gene 'The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.' G. K. Chesterton

View mtnwild's profile


3474 posts in 3728 days

#6 posted 10-17-2010 04:12 AM

There was once a petty barbarian lord, who lived in the largest grass house in the region, who wished to be a powerful barbarian lord.

He started to conquer the neighboring villages and with each victory he would stow the conquered lords throne’s in the attic of his fine grass house.

After many victories he had quite a collection of thrones accumulating. He was feeling especially proud of his new status when the roof caved in and all the accumulated thrones crushed him to death.

Moral of the story; Those who stow thrones, should not live in grass houses…...............;}

-- mtnwild (Jack), It's not what you see, it's how you see it.

View Rick S...'s profile

Rick S...

10913 posts in 3233 days

#7 posted 10-17-2010 04:51 AM

I Inherited that Video form My Mother…....Little did she know the REAL STORY!!!! I’ll have to Print that out and give it to Julie Andrews the next time we’re out for Dinner.

Thanks for clearing that up Gene!!


-- I Chose "The Road Less Travelled" Now I'm Totally Lost! (Ontario, CANADA)

View StumpyNubs's profile


7681 posts in 3001 days

#8 posted 10-17-2010 06:46 PM

There was a pun at the end? Huh! I guess I shouldn’t have stuck my head in the table saw before I made it that far!

-- Subscribe to "Stumpy Nubs Woodworking Journal"- One of the crafts' most unique publications:

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