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> the Stupidity

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Forum topic by Dick, & Barb Cain posted 10-12-2010 02:42 AM 2809 views 1 time favorited 25 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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Dick, & Barb Cain

8693 posts in 3767 days


10-12-2010 02:42 AM

Topic tags/keywords: humor

 

Only 
>in America …...do 
>drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store 
>to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes 
>at the front.


> Only 
>in America …..do people order double cheeseburgers, 
>large fries, and a diet coke.

>


> 
> Only in America 
> ......do banks leave vault doors open and then chain 
>the pens to the counters..

>


> 
> Only in America 
> ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the 
>driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

>


> 
> Only in America 
>.........do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in 
>packages of eight.. 
>

>


> 
> Only in America 
> .....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

>


> 
> EVER WONDER .
> 
> Why 
>the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our 
> skin?

>


> 
> Why 
>can’t women put 
> on mascara with their mouth closed?

>


> 
> Why don’t you ever see 
>the headline ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?

>


>

> 
> Why is ‘abbreviated’ such 
>a long word?

>


> 
> Why is it that doctors 
>call what they do ‘practice’?

>


> 
> Why is lemon juice made 
>with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

>


> 
> Why is the man who invests 
>all your money called a broker?

>


> 
> Why is the time of day 
>with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

>


> 
> Why isn’t there mouse-flavored 
>cat food?

>


> 
> Why didn’t Noah swat those 
>two mosquitoes?

>

>


> 
> Why do they sterilize the needle 
>for lethal injections?

>


> 
> You know that indestructible 
>black box that is used on airplanes? Why don’t they make the whole 
>plane out of that stuff?!

>


> 
> Why don’t sheep shrink 
>when it rains?

>


> 
> 
> Why are they called apartments 
>when they are all stuck together?

>


>

>

>

>

> I 
>like this one!!!
> If 
>con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

>


> 
> If flying is so safe, why 
> do they call the airport the terminal?

Spread 
> the Stupidity!

 
 

 

 

-- -** You are never to old to set another goal or to dream a new dream ****************** Dick, & Barb Cain, Hibbing, MN. http://www.woodcarvingillustrated.com/gallery/member.php?uid=3627&protype=1


25 replies so far

View Bill Davis's profile

Bill Davis

226 posts in 3392 days


#1 posted 10-12-2010 02:50 AM

Thanks for those tidbits. Good chuckles there. Could have been titled “Ever Wonder Why…”

View Jim Bertelson's profile

Jim Bertelson

3965 posts in 2632 days


#2 posted 10-12-2010 02:56 AM

I have some complaints…............(-:

Practice makes perfect….............

And I like Diet Coke better than regular, so yes, that could be something I would order…......I may be dumb, but I am not stupid…...........(-:

Have a good one, thanks for the laugh…....

Jim

-- Jim, Anchorage Alaska

View daltxguy's profile

daltxguy

1373 posts in 3382 days


#3 posted 10-12-2010 02:59 AM

My car is useless junk and the stuff in my garage is worth thousands – that’s why the car stays out of the garage. ( I think I even washed that car…once)

-- If you can't joint it, bead it!

View Jim Bertelson's profile

Jim Bertelson

3965 posts in 2632 days


#4 posted 10-12-2010 03:04 AM

I am totally green when it comes to my car….......I let the rain wash it…............(-:

-- Jim, Anchorage Alaska

View Diane's profile

Diane

546 posts in 3591 days


#5 posted 10-12-2010 03:12 AM

Loved them all.

View ksSlim's profile

ksSlim

1204 posts in 2358 days


#6 posted 10-12-2010 03:19 AM

Ignorance is curable through education and experience, stupidity is terminal.
Thanks for helping us think and chuckle.

-- Sawdust and shavings are therapeutic

View Dick, & Barb Cain's profile

Dick, & Barb Cain

8693 posts in 3767 days


#7 posted 10-12-2010 04:52 AM

Jim!
We don’t have to wash cars here, they just rust away.

-- -** You are never to old to set another goal or to dream a new dream ****************** Dick, & Barb Cain, Hibbing, MN. http://www.woodcarvingillustrated.com/gallery/member.php?uid=3627&protype=1

View rivergirl's profile

rivergirl

3201 posts in 2306 days


#8 posted 10-12-2010 02:10 PM

Only in America do millions of people own their own homes, with lawns and yes, garages overflowing with superflous junk. Only in America can you experience tropical heat, beaches, oceans, mountains, snow, deserts, prairies all under one flag. Only in American can you drive for miles and miles and miles and miles and still be viewing the same continuous field of wheat, or corn, or oats. Only in America can you eat Chinese, Japanese, Italian, French, Indian cuisine all in the same week. Only in America! :)

-- Homer : "Oh, and how is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain."

View Gregn's profile

Gregn

1642 posts in 2451 days


#9 posted 10-12-2010 02:50 PM

Only in America do you go to fast food places to pay for your food first and then wait to be served slop.

-- I don't make mistakes, I have great learning lessons, Greg

View Dick, & Barb Cain's profile

Dick, & Barb Cain

8693 posts in 3767 days


#10 posted 10-12-2010 03:17 PM

I like those responses, I think I’ll change the title of this thread.

-- -** You are never to old to set another goal or to dream a new dream ****************** Dick, & Barb Cain, Hibbing, MN. http://www.woodcarvingillustrated.com/gallery/member.php?uid=3627&protype=1

View Jim Bertelson's profile

Jim Bertelson

3965 posts in 2632 days


#11 posted 10-12-2010 04:01 PM

You know, if they made cars out of that steel that protects itself with a thin coat of rust, they made highway lamp posts out of it, then we would never have to paint them or wash them. Take some scouring powder to it if it got out of hands….........(-: And remember the stainless steel DeLorian?

Jim

-- Jim, Anchorage Alaska

View Lee A. Jesberger's profile

Lee A. Jesberger

6821 posts in 3447 days


#12 posted 10-12-2010 04:10 PM

Very amusing, Dick.

Lee

-- by Lee A. Jesberger http://www.prowoodworkingtips.com http://www.ezee-feed.com

View Dick, & Barb Cain's profile

Dick, & Barb Cain

8693 posts in 3767 days


#13 posted 10-12-2010 04:11 PM

The DeLorian was a great concept, but it ended up in about the same dilemma as the Tucker did, back in 1948.

-- -** You are never to old to set another goal or to dream a new dream ****************** Dick, & Barb Cain, Hibbing, MN. http://www.woodcarvingillustrated.com/gallery/member.php?uid=3627&protype=1

View Dennisgrosen's profile

Dennisgrosen

10850 posts in 2583 days


#14 posted 10-12-2010 04:21 PM

now I know why they say that the old world (europe) is such a blessing to live in…..LOL

thank´s for the laugh

take care
Dennis

View Raspar's profile

Raspar

246 posts in 2616 days


#15 posted 10-12-2010 04:35 PM

Gregn, would you pay for it after you ate it? LOL Thanks for the chuckles, I needed that today.

-- Have thy tools ready. God will find thee work.

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