I gather from your key words, that you are dealing with Red Oak, but I am unclear on the type of stain you used. From the dried tackiness you have described, it sounds like an oil based wiping stain, such as Minwax brand.
I’m not sure why you want to put Shellac on the wood before the Stain. Red Oak won’t blotch with wood stain. I would suggest doing it the other way around, at least to my thinking. Maybe you have a good reason, one that I am not aware of, and so let me know. I have used shellac, but only as a finish over stain, or as a separating finish between Polyurethane and lacquer, or between layers of colored lacquers that I didn’t want to melt together. But, putting shellac on before a stain, isn’t something I can understand at this point.
To answer your specific question, I have used a rag saturated in mineral spirits to wipe off an oil based stain that got too dry before I wiped it off. This thins the oil in the stain enough that it wipes clean without the stickiness.
I have left a stain thick before and let it dry for about a week, to give the desired grain covering that I wanted. I tried to make a maple top look like it’s walnut legs one time when someone asked me to restore a coffee table for them. I let the stain on the top sit for a week with the walnut looking color on it, and then just finished over the top of the stain after it was dry. Looks good now, saw it last weekend after about 5 years. I guess you could say that I sort of painted the top with a wood stain. Nowadays, I spray a tinted finish on, which works much better, and doesn’t take a week, and so I am learning along the way.
To answer from a philosophical standpoint, your woodworking is an expression of you, and who you are, and what you want to leave as a legacy. If you aren’t happy with the finish, or any particular detail of a project, my suggestion is to either do it over, sand it off, or otherwise fix it to be exactly as your heart and mind intended. Learning not to compromise to your mistakes is a good way to improve your work, and your talents over the years of trials and errors. I have several things laying around my shop that are mistakes, that now serve as reminders of good and bad details in projects I have done. Things like hinge cup holes being drilled on the face of the door, stain that was the wrong color, carving mistakes, and other things I hope to not repeat again. So, I wouldn’t hesitate to sand off a top, or even build a top over, if it meant that what I ended up with was what I intended in the beginning.
If you can give some more details, some good photos with good lighting, maybe I can help more.
regards,
Mark DeCou
www.decoustudio.com
-- Mark DeCou - Kansas Flint Hill's Artisan