How long until I'm forgiven?

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Forum topic by RichK posted 08-13-2010 09:08 PM 2382 views 0 times favorited 51 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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11 posts in 3025 days

08-13-2010 09:08 PM

Upon moving into our new home I immediately claimed half the basement as my workshop. Over the past few months I have been slaving away with putting in a new lawn, learing how to be a dad and trying to get my new workshop set up. I am nearly finished going through the old Powermatic 50 jointer I bought. Have been accused of spending all my free time working on that thing in the last week or so. Ordered the new Sawstop tablesaw. Don’t get started debating the pro’s and cons of this saw. Although careful I have had to inventory the fingers more than once and have had to have one of them reattached after sticking it where it should not go. Now I see there is an old Oliver 18” planer up for auction by me next week. I have a suspicion that my wife would banish me to the workshop if I even mentioned that I need that in my shop! I wonder how long it takes wives to get over these sort of ‘unauthorized’ purchases?

51 replies so far

View jusfine's profile


2422 posts in 2951 days

#1 posted 08-13-2010 09:17 PM

Assuming a few things here…

I would tell her I am drug free, I have a steady job, I am faithful, I love you, but seriously, I need an 18” Oliver planer to be satisfied… :)

Saying this in jest, but if she understands your passion for woodworking, and you can support the above listed (which will be important to her), and you are not using all the household money to buy tools or lumber, I think you have a good shot at it. But I would recommend being “up front” with her.

All the Best!

-- Randy "You are judged as much by the questions you ask as the answers you give..."

View Vrtigo1's profile


434 posts in 3017 days

#2 posted 08-13-2010 09:26 PM

Assuming the purchase of it doesn’t negatively impact your other finances, I’d bet that it’ll take her a few weeks to notice the addition to your shop, and by then things should have blown over :) It’s worked for me previously.

View Dennisgrosen's profile


10880 posts in 3140 days

#3 posted 08-13-2010 09:36 PM

does she use her fair amount of money on new clothe, nailpolish , etc
and when you say ooh new jeans or ….. the standard answer from them
is always no they are old….........(but you know its the first time she wear it)
you just do the same…........LOL

View Gene Howe's profile

Gene Howe

10535 posts in 3454 days

#4 posted 08-13-2010 09:38 PM

The learning curve is steep. I learned quickly that it’s easier to seek forgiveness than permission. It’s worked for 40 years in my case.

-- Gene 'The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.' G. K. Chesterton

View miles125's profile


2180 posts in 4031 days

#5 posted 08-13-2010 09:45 PM

6 months should do it. Good reason to buy comfortable throw pillows for the couch.

-- "The way to make a small fortune in woodworking- start with a large one"

View ocwoodworker's profile


209 posts in 3029 days

#6 posted 08-13-2010 09:46 PM

Try this…. Get her to buy something frivolous. and then immediately go out and get that tool you want. She will not bring it up. Works every time its tried!

-- I'd like to believe Murphy's Law haunts my woodshop, because if it's Karma it would mean I had something to do with it. - K.R.

View antmjr's profile


262 posts in 3209 days

#7 posted 08-13-2010 09:49 PM

Gene! :-D

-- Antonio

View RichK's profile


11 posts in 3025 days

#8 posted 08-13-2010 09:54 PM

I have been blessed with a very frugal, loving wife who understands (or at least tolerates) my woodworking expenditures. Being frugal, she does not go buy extras for me to use as leverage – this is the bad side. The plus side to this – there is more money for me to use on tools! I suspect that having just ordered and not even picked up a new saw I might be pushing my luck looking at the new planer. I think I will have to see how the auction goes. I could always turn around and sell my Dewalt planer to pay for it.

View AnnaEA's profile


86 posts in 2881 days

#9 posted 08-13-2010 09:55 PM

Just don’t be shorting the household monies for your shop, and I’d think it should be fine. Just make sure that your sig other isn’t getting shorted by it. I’d make a shop purchase knowing it meant not being able to eat out for a few weeks, but not if it meant dasHusband wouldn’t be able to go out with his buddies after work.

Honestly, as long as isn’t going to impact your finances negatively, I’m with Gene. It’s easier to ask forgiveness then permission.

-- Work hard, play hard, drink good beer.

View DeputyDawg's profile


196 posts in 3990 days

#10 posted 08-13-2010 09:58 PM

I learned 5 words from a clown friend of mine that was 83 years old and had been married for over 50 years. And He said. Every married man needs to learn these five famous words and it will always help in getting you out of trouble.


-- DeputyDawg

View Div's profile


1653 posts in 2965 days

#11 posted 08-13-2010 10:01 PM

man, you gotta get that Oliver! Buy a hammock as well, just in case!

-- Div @ the bottom end of Africa. "A woodworker's sharpest tool should be his mind."

View Glen Simpson's profile

Glen Simpson

25 posts in 3611 days

#12 posted 08-13-2010 10:16 PM

Never, ever, ever try and justify buying woodworking anything with what she spends money on. I tried that once. Once. I hope the scar isn’t noticeable… It took me years to convince her that no matter what the project is, it requires a bit, blade or tool. I wish you luck, and you really can’t do quality woodwork without a planer. I will be ducking behind something solid and watching now.

-- Glen Making sawdust in Alamo, CA

View chrisstef's profile


17425 posts in 3032 days

#13 posted 08-13-2010 10:20 PM

Deputy Dawg has it right on .. eevn if your right and not sorry … I’M SORRY AND I APOLOGIZE!

But i did the same hting when we first moved into our new house, while the wife was getting everything set up around the new house i was downstairs building the shop, and like you’ve said, it didn’t go over well .. kinda like a fart in a spacesuit. But all was forgiven when the new coffee table, 2 end tables, and a tv table came strolling out of the shop.

Make her something special, and dedicate it to your loving wife and claim that without your giving and caring nature i would not have the means to give you something you cant ever buy.

-- Its not a crack, its a casting imperfection.

View DrDirt's profile


4424 posts in 3767 days

#14 posted 08-13-2010 10:26 PM

But if you are banished TO the shop…. Hmmmm

You will be ‘forgiven’ quickly, but it will be the stick that will hit you every time you balk about granite countertops, new carpet or appliances….or if you cannot afford to go to disneyworld, the purchase decisions of the past tend to crop up.

A good shield would be to build a nice piece for her mom and dad for this christmas…Allies are often a help.

Best of luck on it….but know we support your decision! ;-)

-- “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” Mark Twain

View Raftermonkey's profile


560 posts in 2938 days

#15 posted 08-13-2010 10:47 PM

Sometimes it is easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission,haha. Good luck

-- -Zeke- "I hate to rush off, but I gotta go see a man about a log"

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