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Forum topic by degoose posted 1568 days ago 879 views 0 times favorited 15 replies Add to Favorites Watch
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degoose

6957 posts in 1937 days


1568 days ago

Topic tags/keywords: humor

A Sailor, Soldier, and an Airman got into an argument about which branch
of the service was “The Best.” The arguing became so heated the three
service men failed to see an oncoming truck as they crossed the street.
They were hit by the truck and killed instantly. Soon, the three servicemen found themselves at the Pearly gates of Heaven.
There, they met Saint Peter and decided that only he could be the ultimate
source of truth and honesty. So, the three servicemen asked him, “Saint
Peter, which branch of the Armed Forces is the best?”
Saint Peter replied, “I can’t answer that. However, I will ask God what He
thinks the next time I see Him. Meanwhile, thank you for your service on
Earth and welcome to Heaven.”
Some time later the three servicemen see Saint Peter and remind him of the
question they had asked when first entering Heaven. The three servicemen
asked Saint Peter if he was able to find the answer. Suddenly, a sparkling
white dove lands on Saint Peter’s shoulder. In the dove’s beak is a note
glistening with gold dust. Saint Peter opens the note, trumpets blare, gold
dust drifts into the air, harps play crescendos and Saint Peter begins to
read the note aloud to the three servicemen
MEMORANDUM FROM THE DESK OF THE ALMIGHTY ONE
TO: All Former Sailors, Soldiers, and Airmen
SUBJECT: Which Military Service Is the Best
1. All branches of the Armed Forces are honourable and noble.
2. Each serves their country well and with distinction.
3. Serving in the military represents a great honour warranting special
respect, tribute, and dedication from your fellow man.
4. Always be proud of that.
Warm regards,
GOD, RAN (Retired)

-- Drink twice... and don't bother to cut... @ lazylarrywoodworks.com.au For lovers of all things timber...


15 replies so far

View sIKE's profile

sIKE

1271 posts in 2336 days


#1 posted 1568 days ago

I know this is funny, but don’t know what RAN is short for….and therefore what branch of service GOD is retired from … but the only thing I am sure its not the Coast Guard >:)

-- //FC - Round Rock, TX - "Experience is what you get just after you need it"

View Moron's profile

Moron

4666 posts in 2476 days


#2 posted 1568 days ago

forever indebted to those who rest

where poppies grow

field by field till they are full

and only then and by pure scent

will weapons lay

and wind

and seed

where poppies grow

-- "Good artists borrow, great artists steal”…..Picasso

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Moron

4666 posts in 2476 days


#3 posted 1568 days ago

the only thing that stops evil men from succedding is perfectly good men doing nothing

-- "Good artists borrow, great artists steal”…..Picasso

View TopamaxSurvivor's profile

TopamaxSurvivor

14546 posts in 2258 days


#4 posted 1568 days ago

I’m betting on Royal Australian Navy since our goose is proud proud sailor ;-))

-- "some old things are lovely, warm still with life ... of the forgotten men who made them." - D.H. Lawrence

View mikethetermite's profile

mikethetermite

415 posts in 1849 days


#5 posted 1568 days ago

Larry, This is the way I heard it.

A Sailor, Soldier, and an Airman got into an argument about which branch
of the service was “The Best.” The arguing became so heated the three
service men failed to see an oncoming truck as they crossed the street.
They were hit by the truck and killed instantly. Soon, the three servicemen found themselves at the Pearly gates of Heaven.
There, they met Saint Peter and decided that only he could be the ultimate
source of truth and honesty. So, the three servicemen asked him, “Saint
Peter, which branch of the Armed Forces is the best?”
Saint Peter replied, “I can’t answer that. However, I will ask God what He
thinks the next time I see Him. Meanwhile, thank you for your service on
Earth and welcome to Heaven.”
Some time later the three servicemen see Saint Peter and remind him of the
question they had asked when first entering Heaven. The three servicemen
asked Saint Peter if he was able to find the answer. Suddenly, a sparkling
white dove lands on Saint Peter’s shoulder. In the dove’s beak is a note
glistening with gold dust. Saint Peter opens the note, trumpets blare, gold
dust drifts into the air, harps play crescendos and Saint Peter begins to
read the note aloud to the three servicemen
MEMORANDUM FROM THE DESK OF THE ALMIGHTY ONE
TO: All Former Sailors, Soldiers, and Airmen
SUBJECT: Which Military Service Is the Best
1. All branches of the Armed Forces are honourable and noble.
2. Each serves their country well and with distinction.
3. Serving in the military represents a great honour warranting special
respect, tribute, and dedication from your fellow man.
4. Always be proud of that.
Warm regards,
GOD, USN (Retired)

Worked with the Royal Australian Navy in Nam ‘68, drank with them in Subic Bay, great bunch of guys. Out drank me 2 to 1.
Mike, US Navy (retired)

-- Mike The Termite ~~~~~ Working safely may get old, but so do those who practice it.

View degoose's profile

degoose

6957 posts in 1937 days


#6 posted 1568 days ago

Served with the USN at NavComSta H.E.H. [Exmouth Western Australia] and drank with them in Subic in ‘78 a few times that I remember.

-- Drink twice... and don't bother to cut... @ lazylarrywoodworks.com.au For lovers of all things timber...

View jockmike2's profile

jockmike2

10635 posts in 2829 days


#7 posted 1568 days ago

Great one Larry, but I’m an old GI and I just know he wouldn’t leave us out. My dad went through the landing at D-Day and the Bulge, and was wounded at Remagen, so I know he ain’t in Hell. I just servived the Army period, so I ain’t either. LOL

-- (You just have to please the man in the Mirror) Mike from Michigan -

View Maddhatter's profile

Maddhatter

126 posts in 2160 days


#8 posted 1568 days ago

Larry, well done. Had the pleasure of toasting the RAN twice, 1990 in Portsmouth, England (same two to one scenario) and again in the mid 90’s when I had the opportunity to train some engineers that took delivery of a decommissioned LST (USS Fairfax County) in Little Creek, Va.

Currently have the pleasure of my son also being home from Afghanistan for a couple of weeks. He is in the middle of his third tour in the sand pit. It’s good having him back if only for a couple of days.

Many thanks to those who have served; Their sacrifice is understood and appreciated.

God’s Speed to all that serve: May they be delivered home safe and sound.

To those that will serve; Many thanks for your dedication.

Norm
USN (Ret)

-- Norm (AKA - The Maddhatter), Middletown DE

View woodsmithshop's profile

woodsmithshop

1096 posts in 2128 days


#9 posted 1568 days ago

had a few drinks with the RAN in Subic Bay and Hong Kong in 1967. good bunch of guys.

-- Smitty!!!

View Jon Spelbring's profile

Jon Spelbring

199 posts in 2836 days


#10 posted 1568 days ago

<note:>

I get it now. I also drank with some folks from down under while I was in the USN. Man could those guys drink. If God was RAN, then that explains alot – Platypus, avacados (the pit is too big), ostritches (silly looking creatures) – these are what happens when you hoist one too many.

-- To do is to be

View NewPickeringWdWrkr's profile

NewPickeringWdWrkr

338 posts in 1596 days


#11 posted 1568 days ago

You never knew me
as you grew up on that farm
watched the clouds roll by
dreamed of life and love

You never knew me
when you swore to fight
and kissed your last goodbye
to those who waved and cried

You never knew me
when they stormed in
shards of dark metal
quivering as they cut

You never knew me
as you huddled in the grime
cold and so alone
wishing for the sun

You never knew me
baker that you were
carpenter or farmer
not a soldier born

You never knew me
but you cried out for freedom
and defied the coming dark
even as you fell

And as I kneel by your cross
I realize that never knew you
but I know that you did this for me
even though you never knew me

Credit to Illiad – creator of userfriendly.org – Thanks to him for not copyrighting and allowing free distribution.

-- Mike - Antero's Urban Wood Designs http://anterosurbanwooddesigns.com

View eReplacementParts's profile

eReplacementParts

17 posts in 1573 days


#12 posted 1568 days ago

That’s a Great Poem. USMC for 4 years and that one made me think. Thanks for sharing!

-- Find Power Tool Parts - http://www.eReplacementParts.com

View Joseph Crivelli's profile

Joseph Crivelli

44 posts in 1834 days


#13 posted 1568 days ago

I served n the Army Reserve for 30 years.
My last 20 were in Special Operations.
I was blessed to serve with members of each of the services.
Each service has its own expertise and missions, but they are all the best.

-- SOLTC

View Woodripper's profile

Woodripper

17 posts in 1569 days


#14 posted 1568 days ago

I have currently served 10 yrs in the USAF and while I have never drank with an Aussie sailor I have hung with a few Australian Army grunts in Iraq and they were a great bunch.

God Bless all those who serve.

-- WoodRipper

View stefang's profile

stefang

12399 posts in 1917 days


#15 posted 1567 days ago

I spent a lot of time in Subic Bay Larry, but I don’t remember seeing any Aussies in my time (50s & 60s). I did drink beer with some every time we were in Hong Kong though.

-- Mike, an American living in Norway.

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