I am finding myself having a little bit of a difficult time getting back into the ‘producing’ mode. With all the ideas that I have, I thought it would be easy, but I think I am a bit overloaded and I find myself in too many directions at once and having trouble on focusing on just one thing.
I started off well this past weekend, with getting the written instructions done for the two projects that are going to the magazine, but now that it comes to moving on and beginning new projects, I find myself a bit stuck.
It isn’t the kind of stuck where you are sitting looking at a blank page (or computer screen), it is more like having four wheel drive on a truck and each wheel is going a different speed, cancelling out any real progress. I find that I begin to go in one direction and then easily get distracted, and before long I am wandering aimlessly down another path. (In writing, I just realized how appropriate the word “aimlessly” can be, as there is no real clear goal or direction to aim at.)
I need to harness things in and slow down.
It isn’t as if this hasn’t occurred previously. I find that it happens most when I am overloaded with ideas and don’t know which one to work on first. I am like a child at a penny candy store with a dollar to spend – picking one candy after the other and wanted to taste them all at once, but knowing I can only have so many before they lose their appeal.
The problem, simply put, is that we cannot choose everything simultaneously. So we live in danger of becoming paralyzed by indecision, terrified that every choice might be the wrong choice.― Elizabeth Gilbert
Such a simple quote. Yet it completely defines what I am feeling right now.
I am realizing that I have more ideas than time will permit. While in some ways this is a GOOD problem, it also is accompanied by the anxiety that I will not get everything done that I intended. In some ways (which I cannot always help) it will cause me to feel as if I failed on some level. I know it is ridiculous, but it is difficult to convince myself otherwise. I think we all do that to ourselves at times. No matter how much we accomplish, we feel as if we should have done more.
I am aware that this is not a constructive way of thinking, and I am trying my best to overcome this thought process. While I don’t sit here and dwell on my lack of physically producing things, I hear that nagging voice in the back of my mind whispering disapproval. And it is annoying.
Logic tells me that the answer is to pick a place to begin and jump in. I have used that method in the past when this has happened and it does seem to help me start moving in a direction. At this point, ANY direction is desirable as any productive movement at all is welcome.
So that is the plan.
Of the several things that I have in mind, I believe that today I will begin on working on the simplest of ideas. I think that will be a good starting place and will help me feel like I am accomplishing. In the past, I have found that once I begin to work on a project and get something under my belt, the rest seems to fall into place and the other things naturally follow. It is worth a try, anyway.
It is times like these when I am very happy that I write here every morning. As I sit here with my coffee and my cats in the quiet hours of daybreak, it helps me think through these things and plan my day without the distraction of the outside world.
The sound of ‘nothing’ can be a very sweet song.
With that said, I will begin my day. While sitting here writing, I believe I have an idea of what I am going to work on today. The fog in my head is slowly lifting, and hopefully things will soon be clear again.
Have a wonderful Wednesday.
-- Designer/Artist/Teacher. Owner of Sheila Landry Designs (http://www.sheilalandrydesigns.com) Scroll saw, wood working and painting patterns and surfaces. "Knowledge is Power"