brother-in-law died

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Blog entry by richgreer posted 03-12-2010 11:12 PM 3877 reads 0 times favorited 15 comments Add to Favorites Watch

My wife’s brother just died. It was unexpected. He was only 68.

His wife, who was 74, died 6 weeks ago.

I’m a retired actuary. Actuaries maintain statistics on what is commonly called “heartbreak death”. This is the phenomenon of increased probability of death after the death of a spouse. Studies show a noticeable increase in death in the first 2 years after the death of a spouse. A formal term for quantifying this additional mortality is the “contagion factor”.

Forget the actuarial analysis. This is a real human tragedy. There are 3 adult children who have lost both parents in a short period of time.

Makes you pause and think about what is important in life.

-- Rich, Cedar Rapids, IA - I'm a woodworker. I don't create beauty, I reveal it.

15 comments so far

View Jeison's profile


947 posts in 2195 days

#1 posted 03-12-2010 11:13 PM

sorry to hear :(

-- - Jei, Rockford IL - When in doubt, spray it with WD-40 and wrap it with duct tape. The details will attend to themselves.

View Jordan's profile


1389 posts in 2212 days

#2 posted 03-12-2010 11:22 PM

I DO know exactly what you mean! Without health, there is no life, without health, there are no dreams,. I am sorry for your wife’s loss as well.


View mtkate's profile


2049 posts in 2413 days

#3 posted 03-12-2010 11:22 PM

very sorry to hear that

View pommy's profile


1697 posts in 2779 days

#4 posted 03-12-2010 11:24 PM

sorry to hear :(

-- cut it saw it scrap it SKPE: ANDREW.CARTER69

View dbhost's profile


5426 posts in 2319 days

#5 posted 03-12-2010 11:26 PM

Sorry for the loss in your family. My in laws are a screwy bunch, but a LOT of fun. I’m not sure who would take it harder if we lost one of her siblings… I can only hope you’ve been as blessed as I have with a good family in law…

-- My workshop blog can be found at

View patron's profile


13422 posts in 2428 days

#6 posted 03-12-2010 11:37 PM

sorry for the family’s loss .

we can only hope ,
they are at peace now .

-- david - only thru kindness can this world be whole . If we don't succeed we run the risk of failure. Dan Quayle

View Rob Drown's profile

Rob Drown

778 posts in 2920 days

#7 posted 03-12-2010 11:40 PM

Sorry for you loss. Good info too. Gotta keep an eye on the survivors. Keep them focused and encouraged.

-- The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools. Confucius, 经过艰苦的努力的梦想可以成真

View Beginningwoodworker's profile


13347 posts in 2760 days

#8 posted 03-12-2010 11:42 PM

I am sorry to hear your loss.

View Ecocandle's profile


1013 posts in 2153 days

#9 posted 03-13-2010 12:39 AM

Your family is in my thoughts.

-- Brian Meeks,

View F Dudak's profile

F Dudak

342 posts in 2898 days

#10 posted 03-13-2010 01:00 AM

Your famliy is in our thoughts and prayers at this difficult time.

-- Fred.... Poconos, PA ---- Chairwright in the making ----

View NBeener's profile


4808 posts in 2261 days

#11 posted 03-13-2010 01:07 AM


I’m more than sorry.

I used to give tours at a convalescent home. Over and over, I saw how one would pass, and the other would follow shortly.

I realized that … while it certainly WAS sad … it was also some kind of beautiful.

I’m sorry for your nephews/nieces, but … from seeing your posts, here … also glad they have an Uncle Rich in their lives.

Be well.

-- -- Neil

View mhein68's profile


62 posts in 2107 days

#12 posted 03-13-2010 02:29 AM

I am so sorry for your loss..

-- Mike, Southern IL

View ND2ELK's profile


13495 posts in 2861 days

#13 posted 03-13-2010 02:41 AM

My thoughts and prayers go out to your family.

God Bless

-- Mc Bridge Cabinets, Iowa

View okcut's profile


17 posts in 2099 days

#14 posted 03-14-2010 05:49 AM

So sorry for your loss. Sorrow is worn like a heavy coat. Your family is in our prayers.

-- Okcut- When you come to the fork in the road--take it.

View LarryDNJR's profile


209 posts in 2181 days

#15 posted 04-15-2010 07:37 AM

My Grandfather passed away almost 9 years ago and almost exactly a year later my Grandmother passed away without him.

I can see how it would take its toll on a person especially in the older generation who have been with the same person for years and also possibly in declining health which does not help the situation.

-- ~Larry Columbus, OH

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