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251 posts in 1916 days
Don't try this at home!!
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186 posts in 2002 days
#1 posted 12-27-2012 08:20 PM
-- If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith. - Albert Einstein
347 posts in 924 days
#2 posted 12-27-2012 10:41 PM
Send that beaver over here, I got some tables and chairs he can build for me.
484 posts in 2650 days
#3 posted 12-27-2012 10:49 PM
As a retired shop teacher, I love this.
-- Bill - Mesquite, TX --- "Everything with a power cord eventually winds up in the trash.” John Sarge , timber framer and blacksmith instructor at Tillers International school
3213 posts in 2669 days
#4 posted 12-27-2012 11:33 PM
Seventy year old Martha woke her husband, seventy-five year old George from his nap on the sofa.
“There is a truck backed up to your shop and theives are loading up your tools.” she told him in a frightened voice.
He immediately looked out the window, then phoned the police.
The police informed him that it was Saturday night and they were really busy but would have an officer over to his place as soon as one was available, probably in about half an hour. He was advised to stay inside the house with the doors locked until they got there.
He hung up the phone, waited about a minute and called back.
“This is the fellow that just called about the theives stealing his tools, don’t hurry, I just shot them.”
Three minutes later an ambulance and two police cars arrived and the burgulars were caught red-handed.
“What is going on here?” asked one of the officers, “We were informed that you had shot them.”
“Yeh, and I was informed that nobody was available.” Old George replied
#5 posted 12-27-2012 11:35 PM
Employment Standards determined a small woodworking shop owner was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him.
“I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,” demanded the agent.
“Well, there’s Jake my finisher who’s been with me for 3 years, I pay him $900 a week.
The apprentice Tom has been here for 6 months, and I pay him $500 a week.
Then there’s the half-wit that works here about 18 hours a day. He makes $10 a week and I buy him a case of beer every Friday,” replied the owner.
“That’s the guy I want to talk to; the half-wit,” says the agent.”
The owner says, “That would be me.”
10850 posts in 1961 days
#6 posted 12-27-2012 11:42 PM
ok it took me awhile before the stems felled one at a time :-)
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