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View Sandra's profile

Tested and true expressions.

by Sandra
posted 631 days ago


43 replies so far

View patron's profile

patron

12964 posts in 1943 days


#1 posted 631 days ago

ah …. but as woodworkers

we can cast them in clear epoxy
and make paperweights
or key bobs with them

‘mistakes are the best teachers’
(of course you do have to remember them)

-- david - only thru kindness can this world be whole . If we don't succeed we run the risk of failure. Dan Quayle

View whitebeast88's profile

whitebeast88

3407 posts in 792 days


#2 posted 631 days ago

you can’t teach common sense!!!!!!

-- Marty.Athens,AL

View a1Jim's profile

a1Jim

112000 posts in 2179 days


#3 posted 631 days ago

I like the one’s,one of my buddy uses ” You can’t fix stupid” and “don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining”

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

View CharlieM1958's profile

CharlieM1958

15664 posts in 2820 days


#4 posted 631 days ago

You can’t fix stupid.

You spot it… you got it.

-- Charlie M. "Woodworking - patience = firewood"

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#5 posted 631 days ago

Ooh. Good ones.

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View derosa's profile

derosa

1532 posts in 1438 days


#6 posted 631 days ago

I can explain it to you but I can’t understand it for you.

-- --Rev. Russ in NY-- A posse ad esse

View a1Jim's profile

a1Jim

112000 posts in 2179 days


#7 posted 631 days ago

My father in law use to say, re ducks, one of it’s legs are both the same.

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

View ddockstader's profile

ddockstader

107 posts in 1863 days


#8 posted 631 days ago

Off topic, but I love it –
“Eating healthy does not make you live longer – it just seems longer”

View jim C's profile

jim C

1452 posts in 1700 days


#9 posted 631 days ago

“Lord, They listen, but they don’t hear”

-- When I was a boy, I was told "anyone can be President", now I'm beginning to believe it!

View airfieldman's profile

airfieldman

177 posts in 2413 days


#10 posted 631 days ago

“When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then add some vodka and you’ll have a real party!”

-- Measure with a micrometer, mark with a crayon, cut it with a chainsaw.

View Lumber2Sawdust's profile

Lumber2Sawdust

136 posts in 1467 days


#11 posted 631 days ago

“When you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging”

It applies in so many things. For woodworking, it usually means it is time to put down what you are doing and walk away for a while. You end up getting a chance to clear your had and examine where you are at.

View David Craig's profile

David Craig

2130 posts in 1711 days


#12 posted 631 days ago

I don’t have an expression but a thought on one. I always hear people say they are a person that considers the glass “half full.” Ever notice no one seems to care about whats in the glass? If someone were to hold a glass of pee and say it is “half empty” I would have to say that person is an optimist :)

-- There is little that is simple when it comes to making a simple box.

View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2367 days


#13 posted 631 days ago

Be tough…..... you’ve got to be tough when you’re stupid…..

View a1Jim's profile

a1Jim

112000 posts in 2179 days


#14 posted 631 days ago

Lumber2Sawdust’s post reminded me of one I’ve heard. I think it was a quote from general Grant.
“When your horse dies, dismount”

-- http://artisticwoodstudio.com Custom furniture

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#15 posted 631 days ago

I’m loving these.

Another good one IMHO “If you always do what you always did,
You’ll always get what you always got.”

And along the lines of David Craig’s comment – when people say “It was in the last place I looked” I always think,
“of course it was in the last place you looked. Once you found it, I presume you stopped looking…..”

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View huff's profile

huff

2786 posts in 1887 days


#16 posted 631 days ago

“Never get in a pissing contest with a skunk!”

“Never argue with an idiot; they drag you down to their level and beat you with experience!”

-- John @ http://www.thehuffordfurnituregroup.com

View Tedster's profile

Tedster

2269 posts in 813 days


#17 posted 631 days ago

One of my favorites from the building trades… “A little caulk, a little paint, makes a carpenter what he ain’t.”

-- I support the 28th Amendment. http://www.wolf-pac.com/28th

View kizerpea's profile

kizerpea

746 posts in 969 days


#18 posted 631 days ago

Heres mine ..lies have to b covered up.!!! but the truth can run around naked…..

-- IF YOUR NOT MAKING DUST...YOU ARE COLLECTING IT! SOUTH CAROLINA.

View 47phord's profile

47phord

174 posts in 839 days


#19 posted 630 days ago

“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren’t for {insert mechanical device here} my tools would rust”

To paraphrase what huff said: “Never roll in the mud with a pig. You both get dirty but the pig likes it.”

My personal woodworking favorite: “I cut it off twice and it’s still too short!” Embarrassingly enough, I actually said that once (hanging my head in shame).

I have a couple more, but I believe they violate the LJ’s decency rules (wink-wink).

View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2367 days


#20 posted 630 days ago

The football coach said to my son on his first day in high school…..... “You’re pretty big for your size…....” – - – -?

View juniorjock's profile

juniorjock

1930 posts in 2367 days


#21 posted 630 days ago

My favorite: To someone you haven’t seen in a long time (duh)....... I haven’t seen you since the last time I saw you…... Makes ‘em think…...

Sorry, mine aren’t shop-related….....

View Eric_S's profile

Eric_S

1521 posts in 1797 days


#22 posted 630 days ago

“The grass may be greener on the other side but its just as difficult to mow.”

-- - Eric Indianapolis, IN

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#23 posted 630 days ago

Not shop related, but whenever anyone asks me the secret to a good marriage, I say “pretty wears off, but a good cook is forever.”

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View Dave Price's profile

Dave Price

90 posts in 1576 days


#24 posted 630 days ago

one that was told to me was “stupid hurts”

-- Dave Price , Roswell New Mexico

View Rick's profile

Rick

6455 posts in 1635 days


#25 posted 626 days ago

Whoever said …. “Nothing Is Impossible!” Obviously never tried Slamming A Revolving Door!

“REAL Men, measure once, cut once, then head back to the Lumberyard.”

“If the world is round … why do I need a Square?”

“A Chip on the Shoulder, is a sign of Wood Higher Up.”

“My other Tool is a Radial Arm Saw.”

“The Weather is here. Wish you were Beautiful!”

” A Lie gets halfway around the world before the Truth has a chance to get it’s Pants on.”

“Want to Play Mortise and Tenon?”

“I’d plow a Dado in that any day!”
===============================================

===============================================

===============================================

===============================================

That’s all for now Folks!!

Sandra!! This Is FUN!!!

<><><><><>< “I’ll Be Back!! ><><><><><><><>

CHEERS: Rick

-- COMMON SENSE Is Like Deodorant. The People Who need It Most, Never Use It.

View Raymond Thomas's profile

Raymond Thomas

180 posts in 820 days


#26 posted 625 days ago

My favorite “Better get your believer fixed.”

Another is “Two bricks short of a full load.”

-- Raymond, Charlotte, NC -------- Demonstrate the difference!

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#27 posted 625 days ago

More good ones!

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View gfadvm's profile

gfadvm

10591 posts in 1292 days


#28 posted 624 days ago

“squealed like a pig under a gate” “independant as a hog on ice”

-- " I'll try to be nicer, if you'll try to be smarter" gfadvm

View Bill White's profile

Bill White

3350 posts in 2562 days


#29 posted 624 days ago

“Ignorance can be corrected. Stupid is forever.”

“When in doubt, STOP.”

This on is an original, and I was not drinkiing:

“Beautiful” does not describe, nor compliment excellence.” from the White book of barnyard philosophy.

Bill

-- bill@magraphics.us

View Steve Esterby's profile

Steve Esterby

285 posts in 1362 days


#30 posted 624 days ago

“If you lay with the dogs, you’re a dog” don’t lay with the dogs. My boys grew up hearing this one!

-- steve...e-mail-themantelshop@hotmail.com........remember,the best teacher is repetition.

View Gene Howe's profile (online now)

Gene Howe

5412 posts in 2030 days


#31 posted 624 days ago

“When you choose to lie with dogs, don’t bitch about the fleas.”

-- Gene 'The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.' G. K. Chesterton

View Manitario's profile

Manitario

2262 posts in 1485 days


#32 posted 624 days ago

hmm, my favourite, or at least most used expression in the workshop seems to be $%&#!

-- Sometimes the creative process requires foul language. -- Charles Neil

View Jamie Speirs's profile

Jamie Speirs

4096 posts in 1458 days


#33 posted 624 days ago

Turd Polishing for beginners. :)

http://youtu.be/yiJ9fy1qSFI

-- Who is the happiest of men? He who values the merits of others, and in their pleasure takes joy, even as though 'twere his own. --Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#34 posted 624 days ago

Holy Toledo Scatman! I guess you can polish a turd.

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View Rick's profile

Rick

6455 posts in 1635 days


#35 posted 624 days ago

Have FUN Ya’ll.

Toodles!

-- COMMON SENSE Is Like Deodorant. The People Who need It Most, Never Use It.

View burley's profile

burley

5 posts in 639 days


#36 posted 624 days ago

I have always said,”I have done so much with so little, I can do anything with nothing”

View Fishinbo's profile

Fishinbo

11216 posts in 778 days


#37 posted 624 days ago

From the great Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

_
www.sawblade.com

View muleskinner's profile

muleskinner

662 posts in 1038 days


#38 posted 623 days ago

Not really in the “tested and true” vein, more in the “yo mama so fat” vein.

Heard in a (rather heated) discussion: “You’ve got so many chins it looks like you’re staring at me over a stack of pancakes.”

-- Visualize whirled peas

View xwingace's profile

xwingace

204 posts in 1190 days


#39 posted 623 days ago

“If anybody can do it, so can I!”

-- I'm not as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was.

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#40 posted 623 days ago

I’m so broke, I can’t even pay attention.

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View gfadvm's profile

gfadvm

10591 posts in 1292 days


#41 posted 622 days ago

In the same vein as Roger’s: “Yo cleavage look like a butt crack”

-- " I'll try to be nicer, if you'll try to be smarter" gfadvm

View Sandra's profile

Sandra

4151 posts in 677 days


#42 posted 622 days ago

Hey Rick,

How’d you find such an accurate picture of me, scowl and all???

-- No, I don't want to buy the pink hammer.

View Steve Peterson's profile

Steve Peterson

241 posts in 1684 days


#43 posted 622 days ago

“When you are in deep sh—, keep your mouth shut”.

-- Steve

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