All Replies on Tools Explained. Got any others to add?

omg, this had me laughing so hard my boyfriend had to come see :P

now he won’t let me back into my shop!!

-- A woman's work is never done-but power tools help!

STICK WELDER: Is a nice tool to give yourself SHOCK therapy treatments while changing electrodes with a sweaty glove.
PORTABLE HAND GRINDER: Very useful to burn off your shoelaces with from the sparks.
PNEUMATIC NAIL GUNS: With this tool you have the ablity to inflict pain upon YOURSELF with just touch of a trigger. Nail coming out side of board instead of going IN.
NAIL PULLER: (Sliding action model) Everyone has made a blood blister between thumb and pointer finger with one of these.

-- "My mission in life - make everyone smile !"

CHISEL:
A metal tool with a sharp beveled edge. Useful for scraping glue, lacerating a finger, and embedding glue into laceration in one quick action.

-- Don - I wood work if I could. Redmond WA.

CARPENTER PENCIL:
An evasive marking device that has the ability to sit somwhere for days without being detected. When you need it, it has the ability to become invisible. When we do find it, the lead is broken OFF eveytime.

-- "My mission in life - make everyone smile !"

BUILDING STRETCHER:
The tool that you send the nearest dumb ass to the hardware store to get for you when you want to get rid of him for an hour or so.

-- If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away. Henry David Thoreau

DUCK TAPE:
What you cover the dumb ass’ mouth with if he comes back from the hardware store too quickly after he doesn’t find the BUILDING STRETCHER.

-- If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away. Henry David Thoreau

I must have the delux VISE GRIPS – mine break off the bolt head once it is properly rounded. Works the same for screws that strip out before I get them screwed in all the way.

-- Greg D. -- the price of freedom is tolerance

CHEAP CLAMPS:
Use to glue projects together at odd angles because you went to get another beer & the thing broke.

GOOD CLAMPS:
Use to glue clamp pads to wood so you can’t remove clamp.

-- Pat - Worker of Wood, Collector of Tools, Father of one

REFRIGERATOR:
Shop fuel storage device.

BEER:
Shop fuel (see REFRIGERATOR)

BOARD EXTENDER:
Most elusive tool in the shop. Needed only by those of us who only measure once before cutting or those who have embibed mass quantities of Shop Fuel (see: REFRIGERATOR and BEER).

May also be used as a substitute for the BUILDING STRETCHER (detailed above).

-- Gerry -- "I don't plan to ever really grow up ... I'm just going to learn how to act in public!"

I plum forgot about the refrigerator and the beer, Dane. They are essential tools. Good thinkin. :) What was it that Degoose called the refrigerator?

-- If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away. Henry David Thoreau

Tape measure

The only tool that can give you two measurements and never be right either way and the only tool that likes to mysteriously lurk under your miter saw blade only to be found chopped in half after you’ve made your cut

-- Proverbs Ch:3 vs 5,6,7 Trust in the lord with all thine heart and lean not unto your own understanding but in all your ways aknowledge him and he shall direct your path elmerthomas81@neo.rr.com

BUCKET OF STEAM:

See building extender

-- "there aren’t many hand tools as awe-inspiring as the #8 jointer. I mean, it just reeks of cast iron heft and hubris" - Smitty

Computer:
Device used to take place of your memory bank because you suffer from CRS, and to communicate with other LJ’s to bail you out of a jam.

-- I don't make mistakes, I have great learning lessons, Greg

Just like clamps …. you can never have enough tools explained!

These are GREAT!

-- Rick Gustafson - Lost Creek Ranch - Colorado County, Texas

“NAIL PULLER: (Sliding action model) Everyone has made a blood blister between thumb and pointer finger with one of these.”

brings back memories . . I did about 50 years ago as a kid!!

-- Fred, Springfield, Ma

Fred,

I can still feel the pain of the blood blister you talk about between the thumb and pointer finger fomr shop class about 15 years ago.

-- "there aren’t many hand tools as awe-inspiring as the #8 jointer. I mean, it just reeks of cast iron heft and hubris" - Smitty

Box Cutter: Commonly used to slice open cardboard and frequently used to see those white stringy things located about a 1/8” below human skin. Also good for upping ones stitch count.

-- "there aren’t many hand tools as awe-inspiring as the #8 jointer. I mean, it just reeks of cast iron heft and hubris" - Smitty

Sawzall Used for cutting and finding any and all wires, plumbing Ect hiddin in walls.

-- Doug...

Electric Cord:

Used for making sure you are still alive & kicking!

After pulling the end off or droping something on it

Come on everyone rubs thier hand along the area (when you drop something on it) for Damage, Still plugged in?

-- Pat - Worker of Wood, Collector of Tools, Father of one

and here i thought my dad really wanted a building stretcher when he sent me out years ago, lol

Hammer: Useful for breaking nails as well as fingers. Most often found on the shelf above your head; commonly infront of what you are pulling off the shelf.

Jigsaw: Cuts shapes out of the stock, as well as the clamps used to fasten the stock to your workbench… Also provides a decorative edge for the workbench.

Sawzall: Common cause for “Shaken Woodworker Syndrom”... As 007 says “Shaken not stirred”

Mitre saw: Useful tool for sending fragments of cutoff back at you. Commonly results in a hole in the wall, car window, or you. Favorite tool for providing massive splinters. Also used to cause “Wood-Lung”.

-- "Ah, So your not really a newbie, but a I betterbie."