Just checking the news today and found this Dust Storm hits Sydney Australia The story goes on to state….
After viewing satellite images it appears the dust has originated from a small woodshop North of Caboolture, where a man known only as "Lazy Larry" was attempting to break the current world record of 149 cutting boards produced in a 60 day period. When reached for comment on the national crisis we found "Lazy Larry"
delusional and sitting in what he claimed to be a magical chair of inspiration, (surrounded by several empty bottles of XXXX) Smiling he proclaimed that he "could not be stopped" and that the explosion of dust probably happened when he was completing his latest masterpiece a "End Grain, double curve, woven, drunken, spiral".
For further comment on the issue we found the current record holder (149) "Hard workin Harry" fingerless and also incoherent.
in and unrelated ( ? ) story :
scientists in the north pole , have discovered an abandoned warehouse thought to be a woodshop ,
raindeer droppings , and purple stains found at the site , are being analyzed .
it is thought that there was once a massive forest here , that was logged out , and the frozen footprints
indicate , the presence of many little " people " , and one giant .
it is presumed that this " shop " was moved to an undisclosed location .
detectives world wide have been summoned to look for any unusual activity in the wood working community .
a reward has been posted to anyone that can help solve this mystery !
Well I do sleep … not much but some.. and have just woken up to this bit of hilarity.. you guys make my day and now I am in the mood to go and try to make some more boards..
Larry…the woodworker previously known as "Nick"
Hmmmm….I knew mankind was the cause of global warming…now we know who. We will have to send Larry to Copenhaegen to report on how he intends to clean up this mess…..perhaps a giant dust collector…pulled by 7 reindeer? With a guy in a red dress holding the hose?
As reported on the news here.. yesterday was the day that the country came to the city… literally..
Fortunately all the dust has settled here now and I can go back to the shed and …....
I think the report was wrong…he finished the 150…and started testing them to cut the cheese…and after a few hours of cutting cheese…the sun was blocked out.
This mornings news report stated that Sydney air quality engineers took a sampling of the dust cloud to find it is composed mainly of Camphor Laurel (with a small percentage of NGR and PH) and cheese as a binder.
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