I recently added to my power tool collection. in december, i had a borrowed scroll saw, but thanks to Christmas presents and advances on birthday presents I also have a sander and drill press. I have just come to realize that i am very prone to wanting tools. i can’t see an end in sight for it, there is always something better, faster, more accurate. \Do you know how pot is supposed to be the entry drug to harder more addictive drugs? No one told me that scroll saws were an entry tool. now i am ready to trade a kidney for the right table saw.
one benefit that i was not expecting with my new interest in toy making is that the kids are huge fans of being involved in the projects. \i knew that they woud want to do thier own thing.. dad can you make me a …, but they have a real interest in the projects i do for my own pleasure as well. it amazes me how the most unexpected things can teach me things about parenting. i guess we never really get to the end of the parenting tool quest either. just when you think you have every thing you need to be the parent you want to be, something happens that reminds you that there is still work to do. i have attached a piece of a blog called “daddy loves you” that i thought some of you might like, you can read the whole thing on www.gentletruth.blogspot.com
My daughter is about 12 years old. While I can’t be certain how hard she will crash into the hormone wall we know as puberty (the pre-pubescent boy in me still wants to giggle when I say that word), my work with teenagers leads me to believe that any day now she will wake up and then we won’t get along for about a decade. I want you to understand that I love my kids more than I love my next breathe, but there is something about the teenaged years that test even the best father/daughter relationships. I wonder if these challenges are based on the fact that some dads just don’t feel comfortable talking about emotions. Lots of dads see themselves as the person who fixes things in the family. Dads can fix problems, dads can fix jump shots, dads can fix lawn mowers, but emotions are these weird things that not only defy fixing, they ask Dads to use tools that may not be comfortable handling. If forced to choose between using a power tool that could easily cut off an arm or using a listening technique that may lead to crying, I know lots of dads that could get used to the nickname Stumpy.
-- www.robneves.com
8 comments so far
MsDebbieP
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11647 posts in 612 days
posted 218 days ago
Sounds like you have a wonderful relationship with your daughter.
-- "Functional WoodArt" by Debbie, Canada (http://www.execulink.com/~yohan)
Russel
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1214 posts in 390 days
posted 218 days ago
I can tell you from experience, that there does not have to be a break in the father/daughter relationship. My daughter has always been Daddy’s little girl. From the day she was born till today (she’s almost 28) there was never a time when we could not talk and except for those times when she did things she knew I wouldn’t approve, we have always been happy to see each other. If you are as lucky as I am, you need not worry about those teen years. A good relationship is rare and something to be treasured.
-- When you give someone a chance it may well be their last.
Grumpy
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4905 posts in 302 days
posted 218 days ago
I don’t know about ‘Stumpy’ but you could always end up ‘Grumpy’.
A table saw is a great addition. They are more expensive than compound mitre saws but will do everything the compound saws will do & more . But it all depends on the room you have and how far the budget will stretch. You are right about the desire to buy more tools, it never ends. Ain’t it great.
-- Grumpy - "Always look on the bright side of life"- Monty Python
Scott Bryan
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8577 posts in 273 days
posted 218 days ago
Rob,
One of the benefits that comes from this hobby is the drive to acquire more tools. They don’t necessarily have to the latest and greatest but adding a new/different tool to the growing collection helps to ease the withdrawal symptoms. It sounds as if you have a wonderful relationship with your daughter but realize that God and nature do have an ultimate plan with regards to these things. There is a very logical process why, once they become of age, that mama and papa bird kick the nestlings out of the nest and head south for the winter leaving them to fend for themselves. Puberty does bring on immense changes. While I never questioned whether having children was worth it or not it is an relief to see them transition from these formative years to become responsible adults.
But the reward for enduring the hardship imposed by the onset of puberty is the advent of grandchildren, God willing. In fact it is such a joy that my wife and I often wonder why we didn’t have grandchildren first.
Seriously we all survive the puberty transition. It is just one of the paths in life that, while difficult at the time, becomes a source of amusement later on.
Keep collecting tools. It does serve as an outlet for stress. It is like being 10 years old at Christmas each time a new tool arrives.
Good luck.
-- With God's help all things are possible- even woodworking. Woodworking is not just a hobby, it is an (expletive deleted) expensive hobby.
matter
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178 posts in 220 days
posted 218 days ago
Crack sucks, Give me more tools!
I’ve been a tool junkie my whole life. I still have my first set of Fuller chisels and 16 oz. Estwing in my trim tool box. It’s an expensive habit, but what satisfaction to go from lusting over a tool in a catalog, to using it for a lifetime.
I don’t have kids yet, but at the end of July I hope we bring another LJ into the world.
-- The only easy wood project is a fire
WayneC
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5689 posts in 548 days
posted 218 days ago
Perhaps I should send you a free hand plane….. : ^ )
-- We must guard our enthusiasm as we would our life - James Krenov
rpmurphy509
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287 posts in 305 days
posted 218 days ago
Great blog, and very true.
Make a deal with her, she picks a project each year for you and her to build together for her birthday.
That should keep her interested for at least a few years into that strange land we call teenagerberg.
-- Still learning everything
ND2ELK
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2270 posts in 225 days
posted 164 days ago
Hi Rob
Don’t know how I missed this one. My baby girl is 32 years old now. Just the other day she said, “I can’t believe how old I am getting”. I said, “If your getting old, what do you think your doing to me!” I made a big mistake when she was growing up. I worked a full time day job besides ran a full time cabinet business on the side for 9 years. I would work every night till midnight and most weekends. I spent very little time with her and her mother. It cost me a 22 year marriage and a daughter that grew up without me being around very much. I am happy to say that my daughter and I have rekindled our relationship but what I lost can never be gotten back. All that money I made can never buy back what I lost. I thank God every day that she has grown up to be a wonderful young lady and mother that I am so proud of. She has given me two beautiful grand children. Although we live far apart we are in contact all the time and we see each other as often as we can. Jennifer had her moments as a teenager but we made it thru them fine. I had pretty brown hair once, which I kid her about taking away.
And yes Rob, tools are addictive. You will just have to live with that. It’s a cross a wood worker has to bear!
God Bless
tom
-- Mc Bridge Cabinets, Iowa