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Crazy Stuff Stumpy Thinks About

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Blog series by StumpyNubs updated 51 days ago 46 parts 113148 reads 940 comments total

Part 1: Old thread.

1075 days ago by StumpyNubs | 33 comments »

For current episodes, visit Stumpynubs.com. THANKS!

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Part 2: Old thread

1074 days ago by StumpyNubs | 39 comments »

For current videos, visit (Stumpynubs.com!) THANKS!

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Part 3: Remember that dumb Stumpy Nubs Show? It's back...

1072 days ago by StumpyNubs | 38 comments »

The official first episode is going to be posted her on LJ’s this weekend. For a sneak previes, visit Stumpynubs.com The whole concept had been evened out a bit. I worked on my midwestern accent :) So if you hated the first one, you will be happy to know that all the stuff you said you hated is now GONE! We are doing 12 full length episodes a season, but since most people prefer a shorter video, we are breaking those episodes up into four parts of about 10 minutes each. One part w...

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Part 4: I have stuff to say! I'm reviving this old blog...

908 days ago by StumpyNubs | 22 comments »

I don’t consider myself a talker. I hate chatting, despise the telephone and am slow to answer emails which can sometimes frustrate people who try to ask me woodworking questions. But, the fact is, I do have a lot to say, especially when it comes to woodworking. And it simply can’t all be fit into the show I produce. So I need a place to write, to share the countless tips and tricks I pick up all over the place, to talk about the new ideas we’re working on in the shop that m...

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Part 5: I'm not the only moron around here... Introducing Joy, Kyle and Randy...

907 days ago by StumpyNubs | 26 comments »

A lot of people ask me who works in the Stumpy Nubs Workshop. They see me talking to someone off camera on one of the shows, or they notice I say “we, here at the Stumpy Nubs Workshop” a lot, yet I’m the only one they ever see on camera. So, here’s the lowdown on that: It’s much like the situation that Sam Maloof enjoyed, only without the skill and artistic genius. He hired a young man to help him around the shop. Soon he had far more people who wanted to be his “shop boy” than he had spac...

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Part 6: A tough position to be in... (UPDATED 3:30 PM)

906 days ago by StumpyNubs | 32 comments »

(If you read this blog this morning, you can find the update just below… next to the BOLD letters that spell “update”) I learned a long time ago that the most important part of a table saw besides the blade, motor, splitter/riving knife, zero clearance insert, blade guard, out feed table and wings is… the fence. (Don’t hold me to that order of importance.) But most table saws either don’t come with a fence, or don’t come with a good one. To me, tha...

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Part 7: I never get the last word...

905 days ago by StumpyNubs | 18 comments »

Everyone wants to have the last word. It’s gotten so you can’t even tell your neighbor that his wife is fat without having an endless back and forth about it. Yes she is… no she isn’t… She’s as big as your house!… Why I oughta… It’s a principal as old as time. This principal has also been applied to woodworking. There are several books with titles like “The Last Word on Sharpening”, “The Last Word on Workbenches”, “The Last Word on Band Saw Amputations”… I may have made that la...

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Part 8: I've taken up boxing to kick some dove tail

904 days ago by StumpyNubs | 25 comments »

Ever get lonely? Ever feel like you’re under appreciated? Ever wonder why that guy you work with gets all the chicks and nobody seems to notice you? I bet that’s how box joints feel. If the dovetail is the Cadillac of joinery, the box joint is the Ford Fiesta. It’s old, slow and smells a little funny, and nobody wants to show it off. Do a Youtube search on “box joints”. Actually, I’ll save you some time and do it for you… Yup, just what I thought. There are a few videos about jigs, but not...

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Part 9: Hard to spend cash... can it really be true?

900 days ago by StumpyNubs | 26 comments »

It’s a tale as old as time: Boy gets some mad cash. Boy wastes the money. Boy crys himself to sleep. It happened to me as a kid, and more than once as an adult. Here’s the setting: It’s the 1980’s. My hair is feathered and the sleeves of my stone washed denim jacket are pushed up to the elbow. My grandmother turns the radio off during my favorite Tiffany song and hands my brother and I a massive wad of cash; five one dollar bills… EACH! I don’t mind sayi...

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Part 10: These planes are moldy!

899 days ago by StumpyNubs | 13 comments »

I’m involved in top secret negotiations. I could give you the full details, but then I’d have to… well, you know… My source inside the steamy underbelly of the woodworking world turned me on to a secret cache that could have international significance. I reached out to the treasure’s keeper through an encrypted channel late last night and the response was immediate. We began tense negotiations that continue today, as I await visual confirmation of the intellig...

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Part 11: Who says dust will hurt you? *cough* It'll be fine *cough-cough*...

897 days ago by StumpyNubs | 41 comments »

When I was a kid my father was desperate for work, so we loaded up the truck and we moved to Beverly… Kentucky that is. There is, of course, no Beverly, Kentucky. I just got caught up in the Beverly Hillbillies theme because that’s exactly what we looked like. A big 1970’s pickup truck loaded to the brim, and two trailers behind it made us look right at home when we rolled into town. We rented a little shack with no indoor plumbing and my father went off to the coal mines. O...

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Part 12: What in the world IS THAT SMELL??????????????

896 days ago by StumpyNubs | 30 comments »

I walked through the door and it hit me like a punch in the face from that girl I used to pick on in grade school. It was a pungent odor, something reminiscent of verbena with a touch of death and decay. All around me I saw people holding their noses, one or two old ladies sat wheezing on the floor. I made my way over to a boy who was vomiting in a bucket, just to inhale the air around him for relief. From there I noticed a curious thing. The cashiers seemed totally unaffected by the noxious ...

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Part 13: Is it ok to laugh at wood? It is unless you live on a creek...

893 days ago by StumpyNubs | 21 comments »

Have you ever wandered into the wrong place at the wrong time? Like that time you walked in on your best friend practicing kissing moves on his reflection in the mirror. All you could do was stand there with your mouth open like a bass wishing you were somewhere else. But you couldn’t just walk out… it was too late! You can never unsee those things, and they tend to stick with you. Several months ago I wandered into a popular woodworking forum on the internet which shall remain...

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Part 14: Tommy MacDonald and the Incredible Hulk.

891 days ago by StumpyNubs | 13 comments »

We all screw stuff up from time to time. Some of us do it more often than others. In Blue Collar Woodworking Episode #12 I show how I cut half the pins off when I was dovetailing the sides of the “Ultimate Tool Cabinet”. How on earth did I let that happen? This is 100 year old white oak! I’ve messed up my share of dovetails… and box joints… and dados, and, well, you name it! Sometimes I feel like chucking a tool across the shop and getting a job at McDonalds. ...

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Part 15: How often do you rearrange your shop?

890 days ago by StumpyNubs | 24 comments »

If your shop doesn’t have a comfortable corner with a chair and a place to sit and look upon your woodworking domain, you should find a new hobby. There is one thing that I like to do more than make sawdust, and that’s sit back in my chair and look at all the tools and benches and piles of wood. I feel like the king of a wooden kingdom where I can choose which piece of oak lives, and which one gets brutally cut in half. I am all powerful and I have an army of machines to protect m...

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Part 16: Don't lie... YOU HAVE TOO MUCH WOOD!

886 days ago by StumpyNubs | 21 comments »

Ask any woodworker if they have too much wood, and they will give a resounding NO! You can never have too much wood! But they would be lying… Take a look around your workshop. Go ahead, I’ll wait while you’re gone. I need to go get another cup of coffee anyway… Back already? I bet you didn’t even go check because you know I am telling the truth. Your shop is just like mine. It has more wood in it than a bonfire at Woodstock. The problem is, it’s mostl...

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Part 17: Some people just ain't too sharp!

883 days ago by StumpyNubs | 11 comments »

There are a few golden rules in woodworking: You can never measure it too many times. You can never have too many clamps. Never spill your beer on the table saw. And it’s never, ever… sharp enough. If you only use power tools, you’re missing out, buddy! For the love of everything holy, go buy at least one hand plane! I guarantee, when you use it for that first project, you will be hooked forever! There is nothing in this world, I kid you not, like the feel of razor sharp ...

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Part 18: The WoodWright's Shop & The Highland Woodworker... I dunno about this...

853 days ago by StumpyNubs | 44 comments »

As an owner of three strands of Roy Underhill’s mustache hair, which I bought off eBay and keep in a frame above my bed, you can imagine how excited I was to hear that Popular Woodworking has signed a deal to offer the original early years of The Woodwright’s Shop on DVD. Actually, more than just excited, I peed myself a little. I love his show. To me it takes everything great about woodworking, and all that is good and pure about television, and wraps it up into one saw-dusty pac...

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Part 19: Safety week? We don't need no stinking safety week! (Stumpy's Safety Poster)

850 days ago by StumpyNubs | 34 comments »

It’s woodworking safety week. I know, I’ve been planning for months. This morning I finished decorating the safety tree, I hung the red halogen safety lights all over the outside of the shop. My wife is wearing her safety dress and I am drinking decaffeinated coffee this morning, because someone said it was safer. These days there’s a “week” for everything. We just wrapped up “earth week”, already the third or fourth one this year it seems, which u...

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Part 20: I drive a station wagon but Fine Woodworking says I need a "Vette"!

835 days ago by StumpyNubs | 37 comments »

It’s created a rukus bigger than that time I tried on all the underwear at Walmart. A hullabaloo on the scale of the great sawdust snorting contest we did in ‘91. For those who have been living in a cave, here’s the crisis we faced this week: “A perfect storm of stupidity.” That’s what Fine Woodworking appeared to call the greatest threat to woodworking since the biscuit joint. You see, woodworkers around the world are being subjected to unapproved, un-v...

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Part 21: "The reason for the season"- It's almost time for the Stumpies!

820 days ago by StumpyNubs | 11 comments »

All of us find ourselves in sticky situations once in a while. I remember the time I was hunched over that mysterious package somebody had left in a busy children’s store. I heard a child say “Mommy, why’s that box ticking…” I sprung into action, sweeping the little girl out of harm’s way. “Stand back everybody, I know what to do” As I rolled up my sleeves and the young mothers began to faint, I was finally able to get a good look at the danger ...

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Part 22: Did you hear Stumpy was in the Witness Protection Program?

779 days ago by StumpyNubs | 23 comments »

Did you ever notice that one of your armpits smells a lot worse than the other? That little bit of info will clue you on two things. First, you’re a disgusting pig who likes to sniff his sweaty armpits. And second, that the long, hot days of summer are here. Actually, they’ve been here for a while now. And woodworkers the world over are grabbing a cold one and fireing up the computer machine for some Blue Collar Woodworking goodness. Problem is, there’s been no new episode for a couple weeks....

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Part 23: The voices in my head have been getting louder... but they have some good ideas...

772 days ago by StumpyNubs | 30 comments »

Remember when we were happy little school-boys spending the long summers playing with our tea sets and brushing our dolls’ hair? Those days were the best! I remember one year, I think it was right after fifth grade. That summer was a hot one, much like this year has been. To keep cool we ran through the cornfield every morning in our underwear with buckets over our heads, the moist dewy stalks smacking against our homemade “helmets” until we were dizzy. Grandma was always the fastest runner. ...

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Part 24: I think Lynyrd Skynyrd put it best...

759 days ago by StumpyNubs | 13 comments »

The other day I was driving down the road and a bird shot in front of me and tried to outrun my truck. It was a majestic sight, the large wingspan, the sleek feathers capturing the air creating just the right amount of lift to keep it airborne, while maintaining just enough speed to keep ahead of me. On the radio Skynyrd belted out the chorus of Freebird and for a moment I thought I could fly free myself. (“I’m as free as a bird now… And this bird you can not change…&#...

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Part 25: Be a mentor! Teach some kid about woodworking... and how to spit.

753 days ago by StumpyNubs | 16 comments »

I’ve been married for almost 16 years, an unbelievable accomplishment for a guy who picks his nose in public. I remember when I first announced I was getting married. Some said “To a girl?” others said “How old are you?” I was 18 years old, old enough to legally tie the not, but too young to toast with anything stronger than Mountain Dew at the reception. She was 19 and I was a lucky man. And I am still a lucky man, because I got in on the ground floor of marr...

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Part 26: Grandpa's green monster

733 days ago by StumpyNubs | 25 comments »

Grandpa had a secret that he kept covered with an old blanket in the back corner of the basement where we were forbidden to go. It was a big evil monster that would leap upon and devour any unsuspecting soul that wandered too close. But I was fascinated with it, and I often risked death to peek beneath the cover. I admired its scaly green body, its long arm and gleaming teeth. I knew it was old, because most everything grandpa had was old. But it still looked like the day it was born because ...

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Part 27: Old School vs I-Phones- My "traditional woodworking" manifesto...

651 days ago by StumpyNubs | 10 comments »

Technology is unavoidable in today’s workshop. Be it a smart phone in your pocket that rings just when you’re stretching to apply that last clamp in the most awkward of positions, or an e-reader filled with the last two decades of woodworking magazines and sawdust, only the most stubborn among us has successfully banned all technology from their workspace. Even Roy Underhill, who will not allow something as modern as a steel measuring tape in his shop, tolerates the digital filming equipment ...

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Part 28: How I survived Black Friday at Woodcraft: Stumpy vs. the Zombies...

643 days ago by StumpyNubs | 15 comments »

The biggest holiday of the year has just past. Bigger than Christmas, bigger than Rosh Hashanah, even bigger than Washington’s Birthday. It’s called Black Friday and for good reason. It’s the day the shopping gods are appeased by the sacrifice of virgin greenbacks. When America’s trailer parks empty and the Walmarts fill with herds of greedy consumers looking for a deal on something, anything that will satisfy their lust for stuff. I’ve seen a dozen overweight women brawl like ultimate ...

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Part 29: I had a dust collection breakthrough while eating tapioca from a hospital trash can.

636 days ago by StumpyNubs | 9 comments »

The other day I yawned and a thick cloud came out of my gaping mouth, floated around my face for a moment and then was sucked into my nostrils as I inhaled my next breath. For a moment I assumed it was a cloud of pipe smoke, like my grandmother used to puff out in rings above her head to impress us kids on special occasions and weekdays. But since I don’t smoke, I knew this was something more serious. (Tired of reading? Listen to Stumpy read this for you below. Or read on like a stuc...

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Part 30: A message from Stumpy Nubs for survivors of today's Mayan Apocalypse...

617 days ago by StumpyNubs | 10 comments »

When the Twinkies ran out we should have known the end was near. This video was recorded from the Blue Collar Woodworking bunker just before the world ended. If you’re watching it, you must be one of the few survivors. Good for you! I hope you enjoy it… After you watch this one, visit Stumpynubs.com for more woodworking goodness! (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help support the show!)

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Part 31: One man's junk mail is another man's bathroom reading material!

616 days ago by StumpyNubs | 10 comments »

There’s nobody on this earth I like enough to buy a $2000 tool for as a gift, I don’t care what the ads in my mailbox say! This week’s video blog is all about the reason for the season… JUNK MAIL! And there’s some great old woodworking photos to look at while you listen to my sweet, soothing voice! After you watch this one, visit Stumpynubs.com for more woodworking goodness! (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help su...

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Part 32: Powermatic Snubs Stumpy Nubs... (I love titles that rhyme!)

590 days ago by StumpyNubs | 17 comments »

So, a while back I got an email asking me to submit a paragraph or two to Powermatic for their Facebook contest. They were going to give away a mortising machine to the best story about what you would do with one. Now, I already have two power mortisers (a Harbor Freight and a Craftsman), but I’m not one to turn down free tools! So I wrote something up. Bottom line is, I didn’t win. They gave mortisers to three people with heart rending stories that deserved them a lot more than I...

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Part 33: Look out evil- there's a guy running around with a measuring tape!

569 days ago by StumpyNubs | 12 comments »

Woodworkers get inspiration from the most unlikely of sources. Recently I was eating a sandwich when it hit me: I’ve been getting ripped off! Maybe I should give you a little background on this… A couple of weeks ago I read a news story about a guy who was suing Subway restaurants because his “foot long” sub wasn’t a full twelve inches. Apparently he felt a little empty inside after consuming his cold cut combo. So he went around town ordering from every Subway he could find and measuring...

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Part 34: Rappin' Roy Underhill?

554 days ago by StumpyNubs | 16 comments »

Rockler asked me to make a video, so how could I say no? The idea is to make a short video about what inspires me to woodwork. I like woodworking shows (especially Roy Underhill) so I decided to have some fun with it. Watch the video below- then, if you like it, please vote on the contest's Facebook page.- Enjoy!

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Part 35: Ohhh- You meant THAT kind of "stool sample"...

549 days ago by StumpyNubs | 19 comments »

Have you ever said something you regret? I’m not talking about the time you cussed out that baby that kept looking at you in line at the supermarket or when you asked the fat lady if she was expecting. I’m talking about something that seemed to make absolute sense at the moment you said it, but upon further examination, you wish you could cram it back into your pie hole before anyone else noticed how stupid it was. As a maker of fine films, I have learned the importance of carefully consid...

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Part 36: And the winner of Rockler's Nordy Video Awards is...

542 days ago by StumpyNubs | 26 comments »

In case you haven’t heard on CNN or read in the New York Times, Rockler announced the results of their first annual Nordy’s video awards. (Named after the founder of the company) And guess who took home top honors? I don’t mean to “toot” my own horn, here… actually I do… I am pretty proud to be associated with a company like Rockler for my woodworking videos. I work very hard to make woodworking “info-tainment” and it feels good to be reco...

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Part 37: Funny Festool Video- The Finest Woodworker in the World?

531 days ago by StumpyNubs | 18 comments »

I made this video for a Festool thing, a parody of the “Most interesting man in the world” Dos Equis commercials. It’s supposed to be tongue in cheek, so don’t email me saying I am not the “finest Woodworker in the World”, please. Visit Stumpynubs.com for more woodworking goodness! (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help support the show!)

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Part 38: Stumpy Nubs and Charles Neil singing- now THAT'S a good weekend!

518 days ago by StumpyNubs | 3 comments »

UPDATE: Looks like I was beat. Congratulations, Shelly!

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Part 39: What Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant taught me about dust collection...

513 days ago by StumpyNubs | 17 comments »

Recently we did a series of episodes on dust collection, discussing everything from filtration through mustache cultivation to industrial sounding words like “cyclones” and “pipe”. We spent four episodes on it, and how those long winter weekends flew by as you gathered the family in front of the computer screen with cups of hot coco and excited giggles of anticipation. But I’ll be the first one to admit, this stuff all gets a little confusing. Dust collection ...

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Part 40: Stumpy Nubs: Troll Hunter (They taste like chicken)

502 days ago by StumpyNubs | 15 comments »

I am not just an somewhat overrated woodworker with an endless supply of bad jokes and a troubling affinity for blue denim shirts. I am also a naturalist, a man who spends his weekends in the wild observing exotic creatures and documenting their strange habits. My expeditions take me all over the worldwide web, to the lurking places of the most despicable of predators: the Woodworking Trolls. I’ve spent years among their kind, frequenting their natural habitat on woodworking message boa...

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Part 41: Will woodworking become the next TV dinner?

257 days ago by StumpyNubs | 22 comments »

I believe it was Bob Dylan who said, “The times, they are a-changing”. I tend to agree for two reasons: First, anyone who can become a musical icon without the ability to sing has to be a genius. But more importantly because, in my reasonably short time on this earth, I’ve noticed the “a-changing” first hand. Since I spend most of my time in the workshop, it’s natural that I’ve seen a great deal of changes in there. I used to think of the shop as a safe haven from the advance of civilization,...

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Part 42: VIDEO BLOG- What makes hardwood hard, softwood soft, and where's it cheap?

219 days ago by StumpyNubs | 7 comments »

As part of our new, greatly expanded 2014 schedule, I’m writing a video-blog called “Dear Stumpy” featuring wise-cracking answers to legitimate woodworking questions. This week: What’s the difference between hard and soft woods, and where can I get good deals on lumber. Watch it here, and enjoy! Then come back and leave a comment so we know what you think! (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help support the show!)

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Part 43: VIDEO BLOG- Was that Stumpy in the 11/1997 issue of Popular Woodworking Magazine?

192 days ago by StumpyNubs | 7 comments »

As part of our new, greatly expanded 2014 schedule, I’m writing a video-blog called “Dear Stumpy” featuring wise-cracking answers to legitimate woodworking questions. This week: Stumpy looks thinner in the November 1997 issue of Popular Woodworking; Who’s his favorite woodworking celebrity; and what’s the deal with Chip McDowel? Watch it here, and enjoy! Then come back and leave a comment so we know what you think! (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitt...

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Part 44: A 2 minute illustrated history of woodworking (2014 Nordy's Entry)

189 days ago by StumpyNubs | 18 comments »

A light hearted look at woodworking from cavemen to today… in verse… with drawings… This is my entry for the 2014 Rockler Nordy’s contest. I won the competition last year. Can I repeat? Watch it here, and enjoy! Then come back and leave a comment so we know what you think! (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help support the show!)

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Part 45: VIDEO BLOG: Questions about the new Box Joint Jig 2.0 answered, and some upgrades!

108 days ago by StumpyNubs | 15 comments »

The new super-duper box joint jig design has drawn LOADS of emails, so I made a video to answer some of the questions, and to show you how to make a couple of upgrades to yours. Plus- what’s the next homemade jig project? And when will we finish that “No BS Sawstop Review?” Plans for the jig are available here. (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help support the show!)

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Part 46: Big Oil? For get that- what about BIG GLUE! It's out of control!!!!

51 days ago by StumpyNubs | 8 comments »

Stumpy has a little fun with the glue isle in the latest video blog. Watch here, laugh a little, then comment. (Friend us on facebook, follow us on Twitter, and visit the Stumpy Store to help support the show!)

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