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Raising a child! Kids with too much free time!

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Blog entry by OregonBurls posted 08-26-2010 05:41 PM 1106 reads 1 time favorited 18 comments Add to Favorites Watch

I have discovered that the more free time and stuff you give a child the more disrespectful and ungrateful they become. Free time is a privilege from now on. training them in work, good hard work they are more respectful, nicer and grateful and happier.

We are just starting our 4th day of work and the are so much happier. They get along and wow!

So I getting a clean shop out of it. Trees are being planted and maintained. And when they have down time the do wood projects in the shop. No more video games!

What do you think?

-- Greg, Southern Oregon, www.oregonburls.com What can I say but God Is Good!



18 comments so far

View schloemoe's profile

schloemoe

691 posts in 1593 days


#1 posted 08-26-2010 05:45 PM

Sounds like a great plan hope you can pull it off . Watch for child protective services you know its wrong to do any thing good for a kid now days lol…..............................Schloemoe

-- schloemoe, Oregon , http://www. woodrehab.blogspot.com

View rivergirl's profile

rivergirl

3198 posts in 1494 days


#2 posted 08-26-2010 05:54 PM

CRACK THAT WHIP! :) But beware.. these are the slave driver stories they will tell over Thanksgiving dinner for decades to come. :) We had no TV in my house- (still don’t) and my kids never owned a video game or cell phone unitl they were out of the house and could buy their own. We could/can sometimes watch rented movies on an old tv/vcr that I did have. My kids are now 26-21 and 20 and they lived through it. Learned to READ real well.. (and that’s good news since I was a reading teacher.. LOL ) And folks never mind about child protective services I sued them in federal court and I WON (a bunch of American dollars) IN FEDERAL COURT.. and in the process had a few laws changed to PROTECT PARENTS. So I say go for it.. through out those stupid video games… keep a bunch of kid friendly books in the house, turn of the TV, say NO to chat rooms- go outside, door some chores inside and out.. and for God’s sakes discipline your kids. I know it’s not an easy thing to do these days.. but you can do it and they will live to tell about it. Honest. Oh and yes they WALKED (sometimes ran if they were late) or rode their bikes to the bus stop that is about 1/2 mile away.. though it is a flat road- (not uphill both ways like I had to hump on the farm.. ) LOL

-- Homer : "Oh, and how is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain."

View Russ's profile

Russ

142 posts in 1854 days


#3 posted 08-26-2010 06:07 PM

Great plan! The social engineering going on today has made us believe that we have to give all to our kids. Honest work either adult or child makes for a much better attitude towards life.

-- Happiness is being covered in sawdust

View OregonBurls's profile

OregonBurls

578 posts in 1804 days


#4 posted 08-26-2010 06:34 PM

My weekness is, I want to bless my kids and give them what they want.That is not a blessing but cursing them to a self-centere life. I am glad that I woke up. We still will watch a movie together and do family things but no more Idle time.

We have been foster parents for 18 years and most of those kids have been baby sat by the TV and Video games. they are all afraid of work for the most part. OLD VALUES RULE! or I wish they did.

-- Greg, Southern Oregon, www.oregonburls.com What can I say but God Is Good!

View grizzman's profile

grizzman

7011 posts in 1959 days


#5 posted 08-26-2010 07:10 PM

your headed in the right direction…work is a valuable tool and its needed throughout ones life…be productive..and see the fruits of there work is important..when i was raising my children, video games were not in my house…they were just on the forefront and not as advanced as they are now…they were good clean games then, but still had the power to be addictive..my kids played outside…and we worked together when there was a project..i knew fathers who would invent a project so that he could teach his children to work..one other important thing is to all sit around the table together at dinner time..and eat slow so you can listen to your children talk and know what is going on with them…them working with you will really help them know who there dad is..so your making some great choices with what you do with your kids..let them see that dad is fun too..not just a working machine..working with them gives you chances to talk to them when there going through problems in life…i say bravo greg…by doing this..you will help avoid some serious problems that would come with no direction in there lives..press on and enjoy being a dad…my kids are grown and gone..and i miss them being home…...grizz

-- GRIZZMAN ...[''''']

View Dan Lyke's profile

Dan Lyke

1474 posts in 2780 days


#6 posted 08-26-2010 08:34 PM

Back in my day, if I wanted to play video games I had to write them myself.

And suddenly when I hit college I realized that I knew more about computing than my professors, so I went out and got a job.

Thus I’m a big fan of “make ‘em work”.

-- Dan Lyke, Petaluma California, http://www.flutterby.net/User:DanLyke

View OregonBurls's profile

OregonBurls

578 posts in 1804 days


#7 posted 08-26-2010 08:41 PM

Thanks for all the input. I think that I will change my strategy. Instead of barking orders and monitoring them I will work with them or they will work with me. Together there can be teaching. The last 3 days I have been like a drill sergeant but the nurturing needs to be there also. I have 2 grown kid and they where a breeze. But I have two younger ones that challenge me as a father all the time. Parenting is not for the faint at heart!

-- Greg, Southern Oregon, www.oregonburls.com What can I say but God Is Good!

View John Steffen's profile

John Steffen

218 posts in 1711 days


#8 posted 08-26-2010 09:25 PM

I think you’ve got the right idea. We’ve got to make the strong ones ‘cause most in their generation will be soft.

-- Big John's Woodshed - Farmington, IL

View Toolz's profile

Toolz

1003 posts in 2398 days


#9 posted 08-26-2010 09:32 PM

Hmmm I do believe that way the way I was raised…it worked too!

-- Larry "Work like a Captain but Play like a Pirate!"

View sawblade1's profile

sawblade1

754 posts in 1682 days


#10 posted 08-26-2010 09:34 PM

Right move :) Kids now and days don’t have good work ethic they need this in today’s society of free-loading, get it on credit, right now, left later style of living. If you work hard at it and pay for it when you get it nobody can take it from them or you and you need to instill this in them !!!

-- Proverbs Ch:3 vs 5,6,7 Trust in the lord with all thine heart and lean not unto your own understanding but in all your ways aknowledge him and he shall direct your path elmerthomas81@neo.rr.com

View rustfever's profile (online now)

rustfever

624 posts in 1966 days


#11 posted 08-27-2010 12:04 AM

I APPLAUD YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE!

-- Rustfever, Central California

View William's profile

William

9031 posts in 1498 days


#12 posted 08-27-2010 02:10 AM

I am the proud father of eight kids. While your principle is right, I think you make it sound pretty bad, almost like you’re going overboard with it. I provide my kids with everything they need. Realize I said NEED. Their wants have to be earned. They know well that three things I DEMAND are honesty, respect, and morals. The honesty and respect they learned early in life and the morals are an ongoing job that is mine to teach them. I often get complimented on how respectful and hard working my kids are. I am most proud of that. What makes me grit my teeth on a regular basis though is this statement, “You’ve got some great kids, but you’re too hard on them”. My thoughts on that is how in the hell do people think they got to be good kids?
I done mechanic work thirteen years working with the public. I am also a people watcher, I watch people closely, studying their behavior. It saddens me what our society has become. People blame it on this and blame it on that, but the blame can be placed squarely on the backs of most parents. It is sad what I have seen parents allow their children to get away with. I don’t condone abuse, but a lot of what I see kids doing these day, my children would get a good spat on their backside. Yes, I spanked my children when they were young. Before anyone gets into the spank versus not spank debate, let me tell you that none of them have had a spanking in years. I don’t need to. They learned what to expect when they were young and all I have to do now is give them “that look” to get them back in line. I’ve been told that is fear. I disagree for the simple fact of the number of times I’ve been told the good deeds they done even when they had no expectations at all of me ever finding out one way or the other. The sad fact though is that the reason I do find out is because people brag on them. Why do they brag on them? They brag because it is so far out of the ordinary these days for kids to do the right thing without being told. That my friends is a sad fact.
Now some people will tell you that the way to get a child in line is to reward them. I agree. Where I disagree is what is considered a reward. What a lot of people call rewards, I call spoiling. My rewards to my children are things like renting a movie for the whole family to watch. When we watch this movie, there are no interruptions by things like cell phones or computers or such. We own a video game. Time on that has to be earned. We go fishing and camping. Those trips have to be earned. Icould go on and on, but you get the idea. If I buy clothes for the teenagers, I pick them out. If they want something different, they work and pay for it. Even then though, I have to approve them. There i no way my children, especially my daughter, is going to dress the way I see some of these kids dressing. My boys will wear their pants up where they belong. A while back, my boys got upset with me when I crawled their butts when we were working in the garden. I have old fashioned ideas (according to some people). That particular day, I looked up and they had taken their shirts off down to the bare skin. In my house, you don’t do that in front of your mother and sister. It’s disrespectful. Am I going overboard? Maybe, but we’d all be better off if kids these days learned the same respect that my kids have.
I think you get the idea of how I feel on this subject. I’m sorry to go on and on. This though is a subject close to my heart. I refuse to allow my kids to grow up like I see some of these other kids doing these days. With eight kids, I have a big job. I will raise them right though. Thank you for putting up with my rant and I’ll get off my soapbox now.

-- http://wddsrfinewoodworks.blogspot.com/

View canadianchips's profile

canadianchips

1831 posts in 1653 days


#13 posted 08-27-2010 02:21 AM

Rivergirl must have went to school where I did:
Uphill both ways, except I was barefoot and walked on crushed glass ! lol
Discipline is good.
Structure is good.
Values are good.
We do have good young people in this world. No need to paint them all with the same brush.
Oregonburls, if you have the talent, then make the time, by all means use it to help mould your childs future.
My father taught us ” We as parents do not own you, we are here to guide you until you are adults, then you are on your own.” (Similar to the bird tossing the young ones out of nest when they think they are ready)

-- "My mission in life - make everyone smile !"

View OregonBurls's profile

OregonBurls

578 posts in 1804 days


#14 posted 08-27-2010 02:34 AM

I hear all you guys! This is a good subject and I am incouraged and learning from you guys. I will keep journalling here and we will see what happens. I am sure that I will change my strategies as this process unfolds. Understand that I love my kids so much. Just as of the last few years have been off on the right focus. The heart in this is that they become men of integrety nowing how to work and have their work mean something.
Thanks

-- Greg, Southern Oregon, www.oregonburls.com What can I say but God Is Good!

View RonPeters's profile

RonPeters

708 posts in 1536 days


#15 posted 08-27-2010 02:54 AM

My sig used to be ”If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for your troubles, you wouldn’t sit for a month!” Teddy Roosevelt.

‘Idle hands are the devil’s workshop’ comes to mind.

I work in the schools and some of these kids need to discover what the woodshed really means….

Most kids having kids don’t understand the simplest relationship between actions and responsibility.

-- “Once more unto the breach, dear friends...” Henry V - Act III, Scene I

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