If I could issue a BOLO, Be On the Look Out, with the Lincoln Police I’d have him arrested. Mr. Potato Head got into my shop yesterday.
Yeah, he was sick, ears ringing like an air raid siren and sinuses stuffed to 90 PSI. And I suppose he was cranked about trying out a new Porter-Cable 690LR router. But, I am going to have a hell of a hard time finding any forgiveness.
Take a look at this. Gen. Sherman couldn’t have done any better marching through my shop:
1. Crap, you destroyed a carbide router bit and chewed up a guide bushing. Bet that was a thrill.
2. The exact-width dado jig I built last week, you chewed a big a hole in the rail. Why? Just why?
3. Oh NO! Couldn’t leave the the drill press table project alone. Huh? Why would you rout an inch wide dado to inlay T-track? Ever seen T-track mounted that proud, Bucko?
4. Shoot me, not the drawer front for the drill press table. So you found a way to slide it under the guide bearing on the router table. An undulating round over? Very artistic. That’ll work. And ya nailed both ends. It was gonna turn out better? One wasn’t enuf for you there, Snappy?
5. God, what a mess, long-chain attention-deficit disorder. You got this out to fix that, but then went over there and got those out to start doing that. Did ya have to do that 15 times? Really, you couldn’t finish anything and put one ^(%$ thing back?
BOLO! Lock your doors! Mr. Potato Head might be in the area of your shop and fit your exact description.
-- DJ Peck, Lincoln Nebraska. I don't have a Shop. I think of it as a Tool Chase. Where the hell did I put that?
7 comments so far
Bluepine38
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2100 posts in 1254 days
#1 posted 226 days ago
Glad I am not the only one that has those days, when it starts, I have finally got smart enough to go in the
house and talk to the cat, she will patiently listen as long as she is petted, then ignores me like the rest of the
world. But tomorrow is another day and it will be better. Thank you for sharing.
-- As ever, Gus-the 74 yr young apprentice carpenter
woodklutz
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198 posts in 937 days
#2 posted 226 days ago
He not only has struck, he has settled in. He taunts me with mismatched sides, blown out perfectly drilled holes and insist on laying down a newly finished project on a dry wall screw. But I will get him one day, right after I find that counter sink he stole and tighten the the router table fence that he loosened. But first the blood coming from him moving my thumb into the bandsaw has to stop.
-- honing my craft one mistake at a time.
helluvawreck
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10430 posts in 1036 days
#3 posted 226 days ago
Mr. POTATO HEAD is always waiting in the wings. We have met our enemy and he is us.
helluvawreck aka Charles
http://woodworkingexpo.wordpress.com
-- If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away. Henry David Thoreau
gfadvm
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6635 posts in 859 days
#4 posted 226 days ago
Another entertaining post but needs pics so we can fully appreciate this debacle! Always remember that a bad day in the shop is better than a good day at work!
-- " I'll try to be nicer, if you'll try to be smarter" gfadvm
derosa
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1472 posts in 1005 days
#5 posted 226 days ago
5. God, what a mess, long-chain attention-deficit disorder. You got this out to fix that, but then went over there and got those out to start doing that. Did ya have to do that 15 times? Really, you couldn’t finish anything and put one ^(%$ thing back?
The true heart of the matter, if I could figure out the solution to this my shop would be so much better off.
-- --Rev. Russ in NY-- A posse ad esse
oldnovice
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1757 posts in 1537 days
#6 posted 226 days ago
Does Mr. Potato Head make the rounds to all the shops?
When one of my wood turner buddies had days like this he used to say ”everything he turns touches to sh t!”
-- "I never met a board I didn't like!"
DeLayne Peck
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163 posts in 371 days
#7 posted 226 days ago
I believe helluvawreck summed it up very well, “Mr. POTATO HEAD is always waiting in the wings. We have met our enemy and he is us.” And the great wisedom of gfadvm, “A day in the shop is better than a day at work.”
Today, I danced completely around the shop chanting “Bean, Bean, Moonie, Moonie” while throwing saw dust. Hopefully, that ancient woodworking ritual will drive him out.
-- DJ Peck, Lincoln Nebraska. I don't have a Shop. I think of it as a Tool Chase. Where the hell did I put that?
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